Donovan_757

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Donovan_757

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 December 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11730
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Donovan_757 : Currently in school majoring in Criminal Justice to become a cop. Just here to read about the fucked up lives being posted to get a laugh at.

Donovan_757's page activity

Visits<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 9:35pm<b>44LynnLynn</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 7:00pm<b>nanoinch</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 7:57pm<b>LilMissMad</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 11:45pm<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 7:35pm<b>SammyKins18</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 7:09pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 5:30am<b>bambi1989</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 1:12am<b>Gestpacho88</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 5:30pm<b>Incognito23</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 6:07am<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 3:34am<b>Trish01</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 1:23am<b>need2sleep</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 12:15am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 11:44pm<b>forever_alone16</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 10:56pm<b>miwako</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 12:41am<b>Antonia583</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 5:45pm<b>scncman</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 9:50am

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Donovan_757's favorite FMLs

Today, I sat on my balls while at a restaurant. As I was wincing in pain and readjusting myself, my girlfriend came and sat on my lap. She landed directly on my nuts. After a minute or two, I stood up, only to rack myself once again on the corner of the table. FML

Today, I spotted a girl I have a crush on while grocery shopping. Before I could go over and say hi, I noticed her walk over and stroke a few kitchen knives through plastic wrapping. Then I spotted her in the dog food section sniffing rawhide bones with her eyes closed, looking very happy. FML

by grocerystalker / 11/16/2012 at 12:58am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML

by Sexting Parents / 11/15/2012 at 9:45pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML

by needanewride / 11/15/2012 at 9:40pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, my mom came home drunk and yelled at me for 20 minutes for not feeding the cat. We don't have a cat. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2012 at 7:36pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I had to stand next to my wife at the supermarket, beet-red and pretending not to exist; about half an hour into our shopping, she completely lost her shit at the advertising on the loudspeaker, turned to another patron, and screamed into his face to shut the fuck up. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2012 at 2:47pm / Ireland / Miscellaneous

Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2012 at 9:54am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, while in my room on the computer, I had a sudden urge to pee. I got up to use the loo and started hearing some disturbing noises from inside. Apparently I was so quiet my parents thought I was gone and decided to have sex in the shower. It's been an hour and my bladder is about to burst. FML

by WentInABush / 11/15/2012 at 2:23am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend while we were on my couch having a romantic moment. She seemed incredibly excited when she saw the ring and put it on. The way she bolted out the door tells me I'm not going to see her again. FML

by minime94 / 11/15/2012 at 1:35am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I share a birthday with a fictional character who is "untrustworthy" and has a "dark side", so therefore I can't be trusted either. FML

by B-Rad / 11/15/2012 at 12:48am / United States / Love

Today, my dad put an onion in my room, telling me spirits won't haunt me and that I won't get sick. He thinks a vegetable will protect me. FML

by duhasiangirl / 11/14/2012 at 7:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, knowing that I have been in a lot of stress lately, my friend tried to teach me how to meditate. Eventually, I ended up in a deeply relaxed state in which my mind was completely clear. When I snapped out of it, I realized I'd peed myself. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 4:55pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, after spending 3 hours raking leaves, I went to the store to get some supplies. I came back to find my neighbor had decided to blow his leaves all over my yard. FML

by racking-leaves / 11/14/2012 at 2:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, someone stole my iPhone. I used the Find My iPhone app, and located it in the apartment building next to mine. I can hear the ringing sound I've activated, but nobody will answer the door. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 12:50pm / United States / Miscellaneous