DonULFonso

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DonULFonso

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Ulm, Germany
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 13 December 1969 (46 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 17565
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About DonULFonso : The first 40 years of growing up were the hardest - since then it's a bit easier ;) ...

DonULFonso's page activity

Visits<b>classicate</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 1:24am<b>DrafteeSelf</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 2:05am<b>Mons</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 8:08pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 7:42pm<b>totallynotemily</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 4:34am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:55pm<b>vlalam</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 1:55pm<b>thankssomuch</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 3:51pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 2:38pm<b>Wiz_Of_Oz</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 6:01pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 12:15am<b>nygiantsfan85</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 3:54pm<b>vegasked</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 10:28pm<b>HylianTwilight</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 8:10pm<b>melons</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 4:47am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 9:19pm<b>abbiek2</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 4:02am<b>DjeePee</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 1:21pm

Fucked!<b>classicate</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 7:36am<b>thankssomuch</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 9:51pm

DonULFonso's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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DonULFonso's favorite FMLs

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

by tinypenis / 06/04/2013 at 8:15am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2013 at 3:51am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, my very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that my boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML

by wtf mom / 05/31/2013 at 12:20am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I uttered the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" in class. Moments later, I'd been called a "racist twerp" and kicked out of class by the same English teacher who once tried to have another kid suspended for using the word "titillate", because apparently it's "pornographic". FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2013 at 11:20am / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Love

Today, I woke up in bed with a one-night stand. We got really drunk the night before so I went to make a hangover-cure breakfast. Apparently he was so drunk that he didn't remember me, and when he came to the kitchen, he knocked me out with a pan and called the cops. FML

by paulinapo / 05/29/2013 at 9:53pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, in the middle of our one year anniversary dinner, my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend showed up declaring her love for him. They left together and I had to take the bus home. FML

by anonymoose / 05/29/2013 at 8:39pm / Australia (South Australia) / Love

Today, I gave my boyfriend our festival tickets to keep hold of while I excitedly went home to get ready. He took someone else. FML

by festival virgin / 05/29/2013 at 3:11pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, my step-dad was talking about how he was raised in Las Vegas, telling stories about him and his buddies, until he stopped, looked right at my mom and said, "Find her, feed her, f*ck her, forget her. But I never forgot your mom, that's how I stole her from your dad." FML

by MsAnonymous17 / 05/26/2013 at 7:20pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was in bed with my fiancé. After a while of quiet cuddling, I said, "Babe, I have cold feet." He replied with, "Me too. Let's call off the wedding." I was talking about the actual temperature of my feet. Our wedding is tomorrow. FML

by anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:23am / Australia / Love

Today, it was my wedding. Every good wedding has slutty wedding sex, and I thought it would be over after my cousin and his girlfriend were caught in the parking lot. I was wrong, the sluttiest wedding sex goes to my drunk husband and sister in the coat room. FML

by lizzie / 05/25/2013 at 2:55am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, my friends and I were talking about the creepy stranger that used to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changed a lot through the years because I found out that he's my current boyfriend of 4 months. FML

by datgirl92 / 05/24/2013 at 10:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my girlfriend actually yelled, "Why are you making this all about YOU?!" after I confronted her over cheating on me. FML

by a single fuck / 05/23/2013 at 12:40pm / Germany (Berlin) / Love

Today, one of my closest friends informed me that she wasn't going to invite me to her wedding, because I'm too shy and not enough fun, and she doesn't want her 200 or so guests to feel uncomfortable. I was the one who set the happy couple up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/23/2013 at 9:45am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate in the backseat of his car, when a police car pulled up behind us. My mom later told me that intimacy was fine, just not in a car. We were in the car because she told me that intimacy was fine, just not in her house. FML

by backseatbusted / 05/21/2013 at 12:09pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my husband making out with his accountant, the same woman who comforted me when he cheated on me the year before. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2013 at 4:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous