About DonULFonso : The first 40 years of growing up were the hardest - since then it's a bit easier ;) ...
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DonULFonso's favorite FMLs
Today, I was sitting in the restaurant waiting for my blind date to come. I had sat for an hour until I finally got fed up and went to leave when at the same time the guy at the table next to me stood up to leave too. I noticed he had been sitting alone. Turns out he was my date. FML
by kill the audience / 11/10/2016 at 12:51pm / United States (Delaware) / Love
Today, while reading the newspaper, I noticed that an ad had been placed for my job. I asked my boss for a week off so that I could fly home for my father's funeral. No wonder she was so cool with it. FML
by Mitch / 11/07/2016 at 11:50pm / Work
by invasive species / 11/07/2016 at 10:08am / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/06/2016 at 11:31am / United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead) / Love
Today, after having surgery and told not to have sex for two weeks, I've been begging my boyfriend to allow me to give him a blowjob, trying to be nice. He doesn't want to because he can't reciprocate. Not only has not having sex drove me insane, so is not being able to touch my boyfriend. FML
by Anonymous / 11/01/2016 at 2:25am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was informed I wouldn't be getting a raise because I hadn't followed the updated protocol. I said I was unaware that there was an updated protocol. My supervisor said, "That's because we didn't tell you about it." FML
by Myorafield / 10/26/2016 at 2:42am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I called in about a job application I put in over a week ago. Apparently, the branch of the company that I applied to was never given my information, and the position was filled days ago. I've been checking the status of the position online daily, and it still says that it's open. FML
by PhantomKitty / 10/20/2016 at 11:07pm / United States (West Virginia) / Work
by HRomero / 10/17/2016 at 9:17am / United States (New York) / Work
Today, I got my employee review. They thanked me for taking on so much extra work, which helps keep us on schedule. Then they said that I was focusing too much on work that other people should be doing. We need 12 people to fully staff our store for a day, and we have less than that actually working here. FML
by SadRetailWorker / 10/07/2016 at 4:08pm / United States / Work
Today, I finally have a job I love with amazing people I call family and a fantastic boss. I've been here 8 months, and I'm doing a great job, I feel like I could work here forever! My most recent project? Printing our "Store closing sale" signs for liquidation. We permanently close in 7 weeks. FML
by mischalucksux / 09/19/2016 at 9:54am / United States / Work
Today, someone drove into my car at an intersection and drove off. Luckily, I got the car's registration plate and called the cops on them. Turns out, it was my boyfriend's brother's girlfriend, who was illegally driving without a license. Now everyone's mad at me for getting her in trouble. FML
by Innocent / 08/18/2016 at 7:03pm / New Zealand / Transportation