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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30762) - you deserved it (2103)
On 10/14/2011 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved
Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37601) - you deserved it (3801)
On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States
Today, since I was taking a dump in my wife's parents' house, I lit a candle so that it wouldn't stink. While still sitting down, I went to blow it out and apparently, no matter how strong of a man you are, you will still scream like a little girl if hot wax falls on your penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26125) - you deserved it (8052)
On 10/14/2011 at 11:23am - intimacy - by cduran2011 - United States (Ohio)
Today, my dad yelled at me for buying chunky peanut butter. He wanted smooth. Apparently he's "allergic to peanuts." I had to explain to him why his argument made no sense. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26558) - you deserved it (1924)
On 10/14/2011 at 10:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, in the senior class I teach, I asked my students who had traveled outside of the country, excluding Canada and Mexico. One student raised his hand and proudly stated, "Arizona". He wants to be a doctor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23281) - you deserved it (2551)
On 10/14/2011 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, my students took my glasses, hid them from me, and called me a turtle when I squinted my eyes trying to look for them. This carried on for about 25 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19903) - you deserved it (2628)
On 10/14/2011 at 2:09am - kids - by TurtleTeacher (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, my dad took my phone away. This would be fine if I was 14. I'm 22 and pay for all of my own bills. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23353) - you deserved it (3064)
On 10/13/2011 at 7:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, my boyfriend told me that the only reason he likes me is because I let him watch porn without throwing a fuss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22099) - you deserved it (4847)
Today, the student council gave us our senior class t-shirts. Our theme this year is "Striving for Excellence." Excellence was misspelled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17411) - you deserved it (1842)
On 10/13/2011 at 3:27pm - misc - by brit (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, the student council gave us our senior class t-shirts. Our theme this year is "Striving for Excellence." Excellence was misspelled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17411) - you deserved it (1842)
On 10/13/2011 at 3:27pm - misc - by brit (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my friend and I gave our numbers to some guys at a bar. Twenty minutes after we had left, we got a call. We excitedly answered the phone, only to hear the guy ask, "So are you the fat one or the ugly one?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23604) - you deserved it (5087)
On 08/08/2011 at 11:43pm - misc - by me - United States
Today, I discovered that if I work out, I can't get an erection, but if I don't work out, my penis functions fine. This wouldn't be such a problem if I wasn't a professional bodybuilder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24341) - you deserved it (9192)
On 08/08/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Username - United States
Today, I went to my favorite all you can eat buffet. The cook tapped my shoulder and told me to stop eating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21068) - you deserved it (12287)
On 08/08/2011 at 7:58pm - health - by Kathryn - United States (New York)
Today, while walking in the city with my little sister, she let go of my hand. Not wanting to lose her, I quickly tried to grab it back. That resulted in me grabbing some 50 year old man's junk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29032) - you deserved it (882)
On 08/08/2011 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by Sharee K. - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was talking with my mom about getting the my school photos retouched. I believe her exact words were, "They'll take one look at you, and charge me triple." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24563) - you deserved it (3061)
On 08/08/2011 at 2:12pm - misc - by yupppp (woman) - United States (New York)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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