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Dommon's favorite FMLs
by a non e mouse / 11/10/2015 at 5:34pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, I put one of those checkout dividers in front of my groceries on the conveyor belt in the supermarket. The guy standing in front of me turned around, looked me straight in the eye and said "I don't trust you." as he put a second divider between our groceries. FML
by Quendolin / 11/09/2015 at 9:07am / Germany / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/05/2015 at 4:24pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by qourt / 10/29/2015 at 11:21pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I finally bought the expensive but beautifully stylish dress I've been eyeing for ages online. Ten minutes later, I went back to check the shoes the model was wearing so I could coordinate my outfit. The dress had been reduced to half price. FML
by fuzzle003 / 06/13/2012 at 8:47am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Money
Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise. I stood up, took a moment to soak up some sunlight, and then spent the next hour too scared to go make my morning coffee, after my mother loudly moaned, "Ah yeah, give it to me, Woody!" from down the hall. FML
by huh / 06/02/2012 at 4:31pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Intimacy
by themcdave / 05/19/2012 at 4:03am / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Work
by N / 05/07/2012 at 5:51am / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Miscellaneous
by fock / 05/06/2012 at 10:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by madseason / 05/06/2012 at 8:13pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I spent some of my pay on a birthday gift for my wife. She found out about the money going missing from our account, and now she thinks I'm having an affair. I work 24/7 and barely have time to see my friends, let alone have an affair. FML
by Anonymous / 05/04/2012 at 10:27pm / New Zealand (Wellington) / Love
Today, I went for a job interview for a building position at a retail store. They saw on my application that I was good at math. They asked me what the circumference of a circle is. Being nervous during the interview, I accidentally said the area of a circle. I didn't get the job. FML
by mathguy / 05/03/2012 at 8:16am / United States (Wisconsin) / Work
by Anonymous / 05/03/2012 at 7:37am / Australia / Kids
Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML
by anonymous / 03/14/2012 at 1:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
by cmoney6452 / 03/01/2012 at 11:17am / United States (Ohio) / Health
- Today, I’m teaching French in a university in India. One of the students asked me if Paris was the… Today, after recently moving to Australia, I saw my first kangaroo. In the refrigerated section of… Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that…