Dog_Punter

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Dog_Punter

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1102
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Dog_Punter's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Dog_Punter's badges

Dog_Punter's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that you should never, ever, under any circumstance, take a laxative and a sleeping pill on the same night. FML

by emilygreeny / 06/18/2010 at 1:42am / United States / Health

Today, my siblings overpowered me and duct taped me to a chair. Helpless, I had to wait until my dad got home so he could help me. Instead, the first thing he did was reach for his camera to take a picture. FML

by kingwalrus / 06/12/2010 at 2:55pm / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Kids

Today, my kitten decided that having diarrhea was not a good enough reason to stop running in circles around my living room. FML

by MegahnDN / 06/11/2010 at 10:33am / United States / Health

Today, I was mistaken for a male prostitute because I was walking home while wearing my speedo after a swim in the public pool. I was arrested and had to stay in a room full of convicts for 4 hours. Still in a speedo. FML

by xricardo / 06/04/2010 at 8:52pm / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, I was eating a hotdog. My huge Siberian Husky, upon becoming aware of this, jumped up on me. He forced his tongue into my mouth and ate the food I was in the middle of eating. FML

by EpicUsername / 03/10/2010 at 8:14pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a soldier in my unit had unknowingly lost a GPS in the woods and my section was sent to go find it. After hours of wading through chest high swamps in 32 degree weather, the GPS was found, thanks to the soldier who lost it. It was in his vest. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2010 at 8:11pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, I was on the train when I fell asleep. Everything would have been fine but I was suddenly jerked awake by the very loud sound of my own fart, followed by the stares of many strangers. FML

by sleeper / 03/02/2010 at 12:05am / Transportation

Today, I had to catch a shuttle bus. I awoke to the sound of a car horn. I ran out in my boxers and saw a bus take off down the road. I chased it, thinking I had missed my bus. I realized I hadn't only when I saw frightened kids in the back of the bus. FML

by militiousroflcopter / 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, my dad and I were shovelling snow off the roof. I told him I was going to jump off the roof. He told me to go ahead, so I did. He failed to tell me that the snow was packed and wouldn't break my fall. I now have an injured back. He didn't tell me because he didn't think I would actually do it. FML

by Braced / 02/21/2010 at 12:14am / United States (West Virginia) / Health

Today, a picture fell off of the wall in the middle of the night. It hit me smack bang in the middle of face. FML

by Hayleey_079 / 02/18/2010 at 9:22am / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Health

Today, my little brother was playing with my cat, getting it to chase a laser pointer. He thought it would be funny to shine the laser pointer over my nuts. FML

by Anonymous / 01/31/2010 at 10:16pm / United States (Connecticut) / Health

Today, I went back to school after missing the first 2 weeks of the new school year. I got grilled in my first lesson by my teacher for "gallivanting around on holiday in some sunny place" when I should've been at school learning. My dad had died from liver cancer. FML

by Dude / 01/21/2010 at 6:41am / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Health

Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I was falling and woke up smashing my face on the desk. Everyone laughed. FML

by M_Kclift1994 / 01/20/2010 at 6:19pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Health

Today, my young son swung a plastic pipe, it makes a kind of whistling sound as it spins around. I was standing a little too close, luckily it missed both my legs, but hit my happy sacks full on. FML

by Dr_Dolittle / 01/12/2010 at 10:27am / United Kingdom (Merseyside) / Kids

Today, I spent all day organizing a list of electronic parts for my boss. I found the easiest way was to color problem parts in the spreadsheet red and okay parts green. After I finished at the end of the day, I found out my boss is red-green colorblind. FML

by Colormered / 01/12/2010 at 10:08am / France / Work