About DjeePee : I'm DjeePee - not my real name, d'uh - and I live a pretty boring life, with books, series (Dexter, Game of Thrones, Friends, The Walking Dead, Rome), some cups of tea, regular visits to the flea market and museums, lots of antiques, some cats, shitloads of sex with my sweet boyfriend and the dream of having a place of our own.
Last words here: no, English is not my native language.
Really last words here: I can't write short comments.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
Today, my five year old daughter told me that while I'm at work, daddy has his wrestling buddy Melinda over. She also said that they wrestle on the bed so that they won't get hurt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66886) - you deserved it (2416)
On 08/27/2009 at 7:57pm - love - by abercrombieef (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride:1 - Getting Laid:0. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7045) - you deserved it (71768)
On 08/20/2009 at 1:45am - love - by razgriz1 (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I asked a woman where her beautiful accent was from. The woman stared at me for a while. Then her daughter told me that the reason her mother talked like that was because she had a stroke a few months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41000) - you deserved it (7609)
On 08/18/2009 at 12:33pm - misc - by anonymus (man) - United States
Today, I got my first speeding ticket. Looking it over, I was surprised to see that the officer listed my height accurately despite never having seen me standing. I complimented his uncanny ability and asked if it was part of police training. He then informed me that he read it on my license. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4528) - you deserved it (48855)
On 08/03/2009 at 8:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to a huge rock concert. While waiting in a half a mile long line to get in, I passed out due to the heat. I regained consciousness to hear about a hundred people yelling and trying to help me. My boyfriend, who I went with, was not one of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35521) - you deserved it (2307)
On 07/31/2009 at 10:35pm - health - by passedoutpolly (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I discovered my 18 year old son has been peeing on the carpet when he is too lazy to get out of bed in the morning and blaming it on the cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61761) - you deserved it (5480)
On 07/24/2009 at 3:04am - kids - by tony (man) - United States (California)
Today, I went to the water park, and got in a line on a staircase to get on a waterslide. A couple minutes in, I feel a large amount of warm liquid drip on my head. Seconds later, a crying girl was being lead down the stairs being told that 'everyone wets themselves sometimes'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44376) - you deserved it (1559)
On 07/12/2009 at 12:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I had my first kiss standing in front of my front door. It was really cute, the way you normally think about first kisses. When I got inside, I realized my mom had been watching out her second story bedroom window taking pictures. She put them on Facebook captioned 'My baby's first kiss!' FML
I agree, your life sucks (78429) - you deserved it (4702)
On 06/28/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by steven (man) - Cayman Islands
Today, my girlfriend and I were exchanging some naughty pictures. I accidentally sent one to everybody on my contacts, including my ex, my boss, and even Pizza Hut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12606) - you deserved it (51663)
On 06/20/2009 at 3:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)
Today, I woke up feeling like shit after I had spent the whole night taking care of my sick boyfriend. He got up early, feeling great, bouncing around the house. When I finally got up I told him I didn't feel well and he yelled at me for being a bitch in the morning that slows him down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55152) - you deserved it (3655)
On 06/12/2009 at 4:04pm - love - by adderallgirl (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I asked my mom if I could join my friends in getting lessons in self defense. My mom told me that I didn't need them because my face was a better weapon to repel anyone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58579) - you deserved it (4253)
On 06/01/2009 at 3:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)
Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20561) - you deserved it (351408)
On 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm - misc - by blovesg (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, a mother wrote me a $130 check for babysitting her four kids for a few hours. Trying to be gracious, I said, "Wow, thank you, this is very generous!" She thought for a minute, then said, "You're right." She took the check back, ripped it up, and wrote me a new one for $55. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65866) - you deserved it (22161)
On 03/30/2009 at 9:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was working out out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16704) - you deserved it (55088)
On 03/30/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Mark (man) - United States
Today, I was sitting beside this cute guy on a bench. Suddenly, he goes, "I know we don't know each other very well, but would you like to have dinner on Saturday?" I turn to him with a goofy smile, and exclaim "I'D LOVE TO!" He gives me a weird look, turns his head and points to his Bluetooth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62964) - you deserved it (16303)
On 03/03/2009 at 10:38am - misc - by asdfasdf - United States (Virginia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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