Dimaranien

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Dimaranien

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 38571
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Dimaranien's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 10:17pm<b>enotsaras</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 4:27pm<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 5:50pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 6:30pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 2:06pm<b>boricua_4life407</b> - the 10/18/2009 at 10:01pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/29/2009 at 11:36pm<b>Darrus</b> - the 07/11/2009 at 2:36am<b>urbanlegend105</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 3:59am<b>mphsgrl</b> - the 05/17/2009 at 8:47pm<b>jbat04</b> - the 05/07/2009 at 4:54am<b>tiger01</b> - the 05/04/2009 at 12:56am<b>FMLK1Pac</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 7:14pm<b>username666</b> - the 04/30/2009 at 10:52pm<b>chubs</b> - the 04/28/2009 at 10:39am<b>Sunol</b> - the 04/23/2009 at 8:47pm

Dimaranien's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Dimaranien's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini bottoms off so I started to walk backwards to step out of it. Little did I know that I had pushed the door open. My fiancé, his family, and my family all saw me bend over naked. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2009 at 12:10am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a call from the Sheriff's dept. saying that water was coming out my front door. I ran home to find a waterfall cascading over my covered parking. It turns out my puppy had chewed through the hose that connects the toilet to the water. My entire condo had an inch of standing water. FML

by Anonymous / 08/28/2009 at 9:44pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was feeling sick and I farted so loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML

by minnie / 08/28/2009 at 2:30pm / United States / Health

Today, I wanted to be creative. I hid an engagement ring for my girlfriend inside one of her running shoes. I expected her to find it and wake me up, but she didn't. Later, when I asked if there was anything in her shoe, she responded, "There was a rock. I just shook it out outside. Why?" FML

by fmlll / 08/28/2009 at 11:08am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I woke up to find the entire driver's side of my car wrecked. Front door, back door, front and rear bumper smashed to shit. A drunk driver had hit it the previous night and ran. Don't worry though, he stopped and left his insurance information. He keyed it into the undamaged side of my car. FML

by wtfman101 / 08/28/2009 at 10:56am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my husband woke me up at 3 AM by putting whipped cream on my hand and tickling my nose with a feather. FML

by pistonchamp159 / 08/28/2009 at 3:51am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend snuck up on me and yelled, "Gotcha!" I screamed and dropped a gallon of blood-red paint on my new, white kitchen floor. Now it looks like I've murdered someone in my kitchen. FML

by kitchencrime / 08/28/2009 at 2:11am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML

by mariokarter / 08/28/2009 at 12:41am / United Kingdom (London) / Transportation

Today, while driving, I realized I had left my phone on top of my car when I was getting in. Panicking, I drove back to look for it. I found it in the middle of the street, still intact. Yay! When I went back to my car, I noticed I had locked my door. And the keys were in the ignition. FML

by Anonymous / 08/27/2009 at 7:49pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my cat head-butted me awake as usual. I reached to pet him, but it wasn't his face I touched. It was the still-twitching corpse of the disemboweled rat he held in his jaws. FML

by CatLady / 08/24/2009 at 9:38am / Canada (Quebec) / Animals

Today, I ended up gashing my leg rather badly on the corner of a chair, fell to the ground with a very loud thud, and yelled "OH F*CK ME!!". I hobbled to the bathroom making more noise in the process. My neighbor came by and asked if I could "keep my sex noise to a minimum". FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2009 at 3:09am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, for the first time in about 3 years, I decided to clean my car. It was going really well until I looked down at what I was about to pick up. On the back seat floor lay a dead snake, which at one point, for god knows how long, was living in my car while I unknowningly drove it. FML

by snakeboy / 08/24/2009 at 12:49am / Australia (South Australia) / Transportation

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

by NotThatKind / 08/24/2009 at 12:28am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my dad squishing my stick-on bra cups in his hands, trying to figure out what they are. He's an engineer who graduated from MIT. I still don't think he knows what they are. FML

by Kegronauer / 08/23/2009 at 5:35pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to this meditation center which my mom suggested to get mental peace as I have been hating my job and life for some time now. I drove for an hour and then walked around in scorching Indian sun for 2 hours trying to locate the damn place. I got lost and returned home angrier than ever. FML

by zboy_123 / 08/23/2009 at 2:33pm / India (Haryana) / Miscellaneous