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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Dimaranien

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Dimaranien
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 27568
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Dimaranien's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML

#8938821 (196)

I agree, your life sucks (15364) - you deserved it (14942)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:43am - love - by anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

#8921523 (152)

I agree, your life sucks (20809) - you deserved it (2293)

On 03/08/2010 at 3:54pm - love - by HaleyIsabelle - Sent from mobile version

Today, I moved into my aunt's house. She had a little too much fun in the sixties and now tells everyone about her many imagined conquests, including her church minister and several has-been celebrities. As a plus, I discovered she has a habit of wandering around the house in the nude. FML

#8920023 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (13495) - you deserved it (2079)

On 03/08/2010 at 2:31pm - misc - by Kristopher (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got food poisoning and have had the worst diarrhea ever. I laid down in bed, hoping to get some rest when my dad thought it'd be a good idea to sneak into my room and scare the shit out of me. Literally. FML

#8910408 (129)

I agree, your life sucks (23276) - you deserved it (1403)

On 03/08/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by itsEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got stuck in my apartment's garbage chute. FML

#8492121 (162)

I agree, your life sucks (6973) - you deserved it (17878)

On 02/20/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by AwwChute (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I learned the hard way that my foundation shows up under a black light. At a black light party. No one told me until afterwards. Everyone took pictures. FML

#8492061 (146)

I agree, your life sucks (14289) - you deserved it (2791)

On 02/20/2010 at 8:52pm - misc - by makeuuuuup (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while playing Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, my phone rang, and I instinctively tried to pick it up with the Force. I kept trying until it stopped ringing. FML

#8480132 (57)

I agree, your life sucks (3708) - you deserved it (27448)

On 02/20/2010 at 2:04pm - misc - by analinguist (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while on my graveyard shift at an inner-city backpackers lodge, a drunk pissed in a dorm at 4am. I had to clean up after him, wash all the luggage that got dowsed, clean up 2 separate piles of puke, and help 3 drunken Brits back to their room while they abused me. I have a science degree. FML

#8468411 (129)

I agree, your life sucks (17564) - you deserved it (2230)

On 02/20/2010 at 2:29am - work - by underachiever (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was in a public restroom when someone took the toilet next to mine. Moments later, a used tampon rolls into my cubicle followed by an "Oops!" A creeping hand then promptly reached under to retrieve it. Both her hand and the tampon touched my bare toes. FML

#8456724 (219)

I agree, your life sucks (21209) - you deserved it (2422)

On 02/19/2010 at 9:21pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got a reply to my Valentine's Day card that I sent to my girlfriend. I'll get the address right next time because her neighbor is really creeping me out now. FML

#8435520 (39)

I agree, your life sucks (5761) - you deserved it (12258)

On 02/19/2010 at 3:25am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I grounded my daughter for putting play doh in the toaster. She's 17 and got into Columbia early admissions. FML

#8432968 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (17646) - you deserved it (3294)

On 02/19/2010 at 1:18am - misc - by grrrrrr (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML

#8416746 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (19740) - you deserved it (1540)

On 02/18/2010 at 7:44pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a picture fell off of the wall in the middle of the night. It hit me smack bang in the middle of face. FML

#8403549 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (14658) - you deserved it (2249)

On 02/18/2010 at 9:22am - health - by Hayleey_079 (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I received a bouquet of flowers. I thought they might be from my crush, so I excitedly opened the card. It was from my druggie ex-boyfriend, who apparently can't move on with his life even after three years. The contents of the card? "Baby, I got you like a habit, and I can't give you up". FML

#8250207 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (14320) - you deserved it (1988)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:52pm - love - by RosesAreRed (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I went to the store to buy a new lego set, only to find there weren't any left in stock. I started crying before I could make it out of the store. Oh, and I'm eighteen. FML

#8248390 (310)

I agree, your life sucks (5856) - you deserved it (27581)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:43pm - misc - by Tibblesthepengwin (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)