Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

DeviLiciOus_X

Search for a member

DeviLiciOus_X
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 August 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 2996
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About DeviLiciOus_X : i have alotta FML's and i got 2 older brothers (ones called Will and hes 19, and the other one is called Charlie and hes 17) no sisters and 3 dogs

DeviLiciOus_X's last visitors

Freezewtfismyfmlholynemesis1208squigglysharkxabuko

DeviLiciOus_X's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

DeviLiciOus_X's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24724) - you deserved it (6440)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned that if you stare at your cat and her eyes suddenly get really big, it means she's going to maul your face. FML

#6355609
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12123) - you deserved it (21178)

On 11/18/2009 at 4:01pm - animals - by nycplywood (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I realized that I hadn't shaved in so long that when the wind blew, the hairs on my legs moved in the breeze. FML

#6270063
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6245) - you deserved it (40949)

On 11/12/2009 at 6:17am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

#6207441
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25621) - you deserved it (2399)

On 11/08/2009 at 2:26am - animals - by birdbath (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was driving my child to school when the car let out a huge bang. It shuddered to a halt. My son started laughing. I asked him what was funny but he wouldn't tell me. The car wouldn't start. I called RACV and they told me the problem. My son had rolled 9 golf balls into the exhaust pipe. FML

#6095339
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27636) - you deserved it (3064)

On 11/01/2009 at 1:44am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was playing with my cat and holding her upside down. She started frantically meowing, but I still continued on playing with her. Seconds later, she got explosive diarrhea everywhere, including my hair, face, shirt, and mouth. FML

#6040097
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9555) - you deserved it (74529)

On 10/28/2009 at 2:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I met up with a girl I've been talking to on the internet for a year and a half. Turns out she edits her moustache out of all her photos. FML

#6035078
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14111) - you deserved it (30025)

On 10/28/2009 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I went on a date with an awesome guy. I got super hammered and punched him in the face. FML

#5894935
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5847) - you deserved it (43472)

On 10/19/2009 at 11:42am - love - by DrunkGirl - Sent from mobile version

Today, I asked a girl I like to homecoming. I brought her to my house beforehand for dinner with my family. My brother asked her whether we were just friends or dating, she shouts "Just friends!" and then starts flirting with him with me in the room. FML

#5744040
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32844) - you deserved it (3049)

On 10/09/2009 at 6:11pm - misc - by Charon - United States (Virginia)

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

#5550225
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60703) - you deserved it (4413)

On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

#5187635
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56337) - you deserved it (14570)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was arguing with my dad. I called him a geriatric fool. He replied with, "Well at least I know who my biological father is." I have no idea if he's joking. FML

#5107055
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48682) - you deserved it (7070)

On 09/07/2009 at 3:19pm - kids - by Waheyyy (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I saw a girl I haven't seen in 4 years. She used to like me back then. Since then I have lost 50 pounds, and never had the confidence to ask her out. She said I looked really sexy so I decided to ask her out on a date then and there. She said no, she only likes fat guys. FML

#5072938
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44410) - you deserved it (4006)

On 09/06/2009 at 12:19am - love - by Nofatforme (man) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: