This member hasn't filled in the description.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, I was trying to convince a friend that even though I'm blonde, I'm not the oblivious or stupid moron everyone apparently thinks I am. Then I smacked face-first into a glass door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20231) - you deserved it (20144)
On 05/05/2011 at 4:01pm - misc - by Blondie (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)
Today, I wore a Stanford college T-shirt to school. My Spanish teacher took one look at it and said "You wish". FML
I agree, your life sucks (27632) - you deserved it (6064)
On 04/12/2011 at 6:09am - misc - by anon -
Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39342) - you deserved it (12265)
On 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm - love - by ouch - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was painting my bedroom walls, when I was struck with an uncontrollable bout of diarrhea. I had to watch helplessly from the en-suite bathroom as my 2 year old daughter painted a lovely picture for me, all over my new $500 sofa. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21238) - you deserved it (7033)
On 03/28/2011 at 8:31pm - kids - by ohshit (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45168) - you deserved it (3521) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 03/05/2011 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous - France (Alsace)
Today, there were a few loud and annoying kids running around my store. My coworker and I started talking and I jokingly stated "Yeah, kids ruin everything." But before I could get out "God knows I'm not ready to be a dad," my phone rang. It was my one night stand. I'm going to be a daddy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9699) - you deserved it (51397)
On 09/24/2010 at 7:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, a very good platonic friend of mine said he had a question to ask me. Jokingly, I threw my arms around his neck and said 'Oh yes, yes, a thousand times yes!' When I sat back down, I saw tears in his eyes, and he said 'You've made me the happiest man alive' as he pulled a small box out of his coat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20736) - you deserved it (74482)
On 08/06/2009 at 5:25pm - love - by dundundadumb (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to Macy's to go shopping, I was wearing a shirt and tie and dressed nicely. Customers came up to me with questions, but I just ignored them. Minutes later, thinking I was an employee, the manager came and yelled at me, and threatened to fire me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33649) - you deserved it (9630)
On 02/20/2009 at 12:27am - work - by muffinmen1022 (man) - United States (California)
Today, I went to my car to discover a note on the windshield from the city telling me that they had hit my car. On top of that note was a parking ticket, also from the city. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23789) - you deserved it (1689)
On 02/08/2009 at 12:32am - misc - by lk26 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9450) - you deserved it (15741)
On 01/31/2009 at 6:14pm - misc - by joe - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
