Demonfish

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Demonfish

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3452
  • Number of comments : 238
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About Demonfish : I'm here to relieve boredom by laughing at other peoples humerous misfortunes, and occasionally offer condolences when the misfortune is depressing, which is basically what the rest of you are here for.
Generally I try not to take things too seriously, I prefer the place in between silliness and seriousness, so my comments may vary in sensibility, of you have a problem with that, I have but one thing to say to you: "tough shit."
In my as of yet relatively short life, I've been called many things: genius, idiot, insane, wise, wonderful, even beautiful, by one particularly deluded, and stunningly gorgeous girl. I also know a guy who is firmly convinced that I am the Antichrist... well, each to his own, I suppose.

Demonfish's page activity

Visits<b>InteresingMan</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 4:27pm<b>ItsAlly</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 3:45am<b>unsealingkale</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 1:35am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 2:22pm<b>saranguyen24</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 1:14am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 3:33am<b>vb68</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 10:31pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 6:17pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 6:20pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 10:34am<b>Dowbo</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 1:12am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 1:47pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 12:49pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 1:19am<b>Phantomisr</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 1:48pm<b>SethFAX</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 10:48am<b>izkiz</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 11:37pm<b>snipebp</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 10:23am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 12:20am<b>Dowbo</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 7:13am

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Demonfish's favorite FMLs

Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML

by brooke / 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I got back to work at my hospital after some sick leave. The first jackass to waste my time was a guy with leg lacerations. This, he claimed, was because he tried to break a samurai sword over his leg as part of a bet. It's day one and already I want to kill myself. FML

by Simms / 03/13/2012 at 10:32pm / United States / Work

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

by scaredshitless / 03/03/2012 at 8:55am / Finland (Southern Finland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that during fire drills, my school lines everyone up next to some extremely flammable and explosive propane tanks. If we ever have a real fire, we will all die. FML

by afraidtoburn / 02/25/2012 at 11:18pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my mom about an article I'd seen that said people tend to make the most mistakes at 2 to 3 in the morning. Without a trace of humor in her voice, she said, "Tell me about it. You were conceived round about then." FML

by fmlsomuch / 02/25/2012 at 3:51pm / Japan / Miscellaneous

Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML

by BadGuyLuck / 02/25/2012 at 1:33am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML

by mary / 02/21/2012 at 10:33am / Australia / Health

Today, my car key clicker wouldn't let me in. After a few frustrating minutes, I realized that, besides electronic capabilities, it's also an actual key that fits in a hole to unlock my door. FML

by Anonymous / 02/20/2012 at 1:05am / United States / Transportation

Today, I found out that my desk is perfectly placed so that my boss can shoot me with a Nerf gun from his office. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2012 at 9:42pm / United States / Work

Today, I discovered that you can't always assume your little brother is kidding when he says that you have a spider on top of your head. FML

by thatoneperson / 02/17/2012 at 7:43am / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML

by JukeboxValkyrie / 02/16/2012 at 2:52am / United States (Florida) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

by great / 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm / United States / Work

Today, my social anxiety got so bad, I nearly had a panic attack when too many people joined my World of Warcraft party. FML

by SocialAnxietyNightmare / 02/09/2012 at 11:42am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, after trying to find the perfect picture for the guy I have a huge crush on, I finally found one and sent it to him. His return picture? Himself in a Batman mask and sombrero. FML

by scribbles1475 / 12/15/2011 at 12:00am / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, my boyfriend got upset after I politely asked him to do the laundry. He takes every chance he gets to act macho and brag to people about how he's in the Marines, but apparently he is too much of a pussy to act like a man and clean his own clothes. FML

by sigh / 11/24/2011 at 2:30pm / United States (California) / Love