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Today, my wife and I almost got a divorce over a game of Yahtzee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21689) - you deserved it (13085)
On 08/07/2011 at 5:44pm - love - by Username - United States
Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28634) - you deserved it (8928)
On 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28580) - you deserved it (2524)
On 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18511) - you deserved it (5022)
On 08/06/2011 at 3:10pm - misc - by lostforwords (woman) - Ireland (Tipperary)
Today, my mom was screaming at me and said, "I wish I'd never adopted you." I guess I'm adopted then. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46874) - you deserved it (1915)
On 08/04/2011 at 10:45pm - misc - by Thebestman123 - United States (Iowa)
Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37758) - you deserved it (2164)
On 08/04/2011 at 1:44am - animals - by SydIsPrettyCool - United States (Michigan)
Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25751) - you deserved it (2100)
On 08/02/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by scully11 (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, I broke my leg while trying to show my friend how I broke my other leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18852) - you deserved it (60487)
On 08/02/2011 at 10:17am - health - by chinchilla4404 (woman) - United States
Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36331) - you deserved it (10768)
On 08/02/2011 at 12:58am - kids - by ohcrap - United States (Colorado)
Today, my parents wouldn't let me go to the fair because they reckon my IQ is so low, I could quite possibly choke on cotton candy and pass out confused by the hall of mirrors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20116) - you deserved it (4450)
On 08/01/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by vsf - United States
Today, while waiting at the park for my friend, an intoxicated tramp came up to me and asked me out. After I politely declined, he snatched the phone from my hand, threw it on the ground, screamed that I was a "two-timing whore", and staggered away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22257) - you deserved it (2282)
On 08/01/2011 at 5:29pm - misc - by Emma - United States (New York)
Today, I walked in on my brother performing voodoo on a doll with my picture taped to its face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25637) - you deserved it (3316)
Today, two guys proclaiming that they were both Batman attacked me on the street. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23424) - you deserved it (2711)
On 07/31/2011 at 2:17am - health - by The Joker? - United States (Iowa)
Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30656) - you deserved it (3231)
On 07/30/2011 at 10:07am - misc - by ewww - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I asked the girl I like to send me 'yummy pictures.' I got a picture of cheesecake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8472) - you deserved it (71942)
On 07/22/2011 at 2:29am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Monday 17 June 2013
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