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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Darraghscoot

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Darraghscoot
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1418
  • Number of comments : 126
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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Darraghscoot's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a job interview. When I got there, the lady interviewing me shook my hand and said, 'Hello, I'm gay.' I found this strange and I didn't know what to say, so I stated, 'Aw, it's OK, I support you.' She looked pretty offended, and I realized why when I found out that her name was Gaye. FML

#13711659 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (25455) - you deserved it (11601)

On 11/04/2010 at 5:18am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized every time I go to take a poop, my 9 month old crawls into the bathroom and sobs at my feet. I now have to let my 9 month old sit on my lap while I shit, because I can't do it any other way. The end to all privacy has now come. FML

#12146210 (242)

I agree, your life sucks (22532) - you deserved it (7012)

On 07/27/2010 at 2:44pm - kids - by mr - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to bed with three hot, half-naked girls beneath me. I was in the bunk above. Alone. FML

#12143188 (282)

I agree, your life sucks (27067) - you deserved it (11217)

On 07/27/2010 at 10:43am - intimacy - by lonelyguy321 - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was walking with my girlfriend of a year and a half on the beach. Everything was fine until she saw a plane with a banner behind it saying "Cassie, will you marry me?" She said yes. I didn't order a plane. FML

#9122302 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (36230) - you deserved it (2885)

On 03/16/2010 at 12:50am - love - by ManInTrouble - United States (California)

Today, I was so bored I googled the word "bored." The results were boring. FML

#9117281 (115)

I agree, your life sucks (6483) - you deserved it (24400)

On 03/15/2010 at 10:27pm - misc - by hiii. (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

#8741180 (227)

I agree, your life sucks (14922) - you deserved it (4840)

On 03/01/2010 at 2:30am - intimacy - by Lovejunkie (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was on Facebook when I saw a link about what Pokémon would look like if they had genitals. I'm not quite sure why, but I decided to click it, and at that exact moment, my brother and his friend walked in. They told my mom I was looking at Pokémon porn. I'll never be able to live this down. FML

#7124750 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (5843) - you deserved it (13572)

On 01/03/2010 at 11:40am - intimacy - by grounded (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I found out that my wife had an affair with our marriage counselor. FML

#6480893 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (45041) - you deserved it (1930)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:39pm - love - by Nobody (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to the grocery store where I work to pick up my pay check. After I got it, I headed back to the dorms to take a quick nap before Chemistry later. I woke up, and my check was gone. I later found it. In the form of a text from my roommate saying he gambled away 'our' money. FML

#6253636 (106)

I agree, your life sucks (20904) - you deserved it (2311)

On 11/11/2009 at 1:55am - money - by whoawhat (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was following my dad while texting, not really watching where we're going. Suddenly, he ran ahead and I looked up to see what he was doing. We were in the men's bathroom. There were 3 guys at the urinals. I'm a 15 year old girl. FML

#5025816 (180)

I agree, your life sucks (6664) - you deserved it (39034)

On 09/03/2009 at 7:14pm - misc - by iTerrify (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML

#4382309 (203)

I agree, your life sucks (50926) - you deserved it (2418)

On 08/08/2009 at 9:42am - misc - by oshitdonotwant (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was getting mugged. In shock, I said, "Are you mugging me?!" To which the mugger responded, "Duh, do you think I grabbed you for your looks?" FML

#4274462 (97)

I agree, your life sucks (39701) - you deserved it (5105)

On 08/04/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was fingering my girlfriend. When suddenly she started crying at the peak of her orgasm, when I asked what was wrong, she replied. "I-I-I MISS HIM!" She was crying about her ex boyfriend. While I was inside her. FML

#1453860 (328)

I agree, your life sucks (111975) - you deserved it (7395)

On 04/29/2009 at 11:47am - intimacy - by fingerfuckd (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was taking a shower with my new boyfriend for the first time. Last night was the first night we spent together. As I was washing my hair, I looked down at my feet and noticed yellow water. Some of the warm water I felt on my feet was not from the shower head. FML

#436547 (246)

I agree, your life sucks (82615) - you deserved it (13768)

On 03/18/2009 at 9:47am - intimacy - by Marcela (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend called me by his mother's name for the 100th time. I'm a guy. FML

#4745 (129)

I agree, your life sucks (23875) - you deserved it (6186)

On 02/01/2009 at 2:01pm - love - by someonevexed - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)