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Danny_B

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Danny_B
  • Town/Country : Wellington, New Zealand
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 6 April 1974 (40 years)
  • Number of visits : 2848
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

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Danny_B's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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Danny_B's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to meet the girl I'd been talking to online for a while, and fallen in love with. When I arrived at her house, my brother answered the door and took a picture of my shocked face. He and his girlfriend had planned the entire thing because I'm apparently the most gullible member of the family. FML

#14191848
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33675) - you deserved it (7438)

On 12/13/2010 at 3:29pm - love - by phonesage (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, while taking a shower, I was enthusiastically singing one of my favorite songs. When I got out, I noticed a bunch of things missing, and a note on my desk saying "shut the f*ck up, you suck." I was robbed and judged by a thief. FML

#14190731
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29953) - you deserved it (3578)

On 12/13/2010 at 1:10pm - misc - by Username - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

#14190460
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37321) - you deserved it (9473)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I'm spending the night with the guy I've been interested in for a while. Instead of sleeping in the same bed together, he insists that I sleep in another room because he "doesn't want to be tempted to do anything." So, I'm alone, in my best lingerie, in his little brother's room. FML

#14189329
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28918) - you deserved it (7257)

On 12/13/2010 at 9:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

#14187537
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94202) - you deserved it (5040)

On 12/13/2010 at 4:16am - health - by Christopher - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was driving my family home, when my 7 year old son had to pee. Having long since passed any rest stops, I made him use a bottle. Once he was done, he grenaded the bottle out the window, hitting someone's windshield dead on. FML

#14186917
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8210) - you deserved it (22377)

On 12/13/2010 at 2:35am - misc - by wtfson -

Today, at Arby's, there were two cute guys behind me in line. Right before ordering, my dad said loudly "Go get the calorie sheet. You need to lose more weight before you think about going after those guys." FML

#14186357
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27889) - you deserved it (3651)

On 12/13/2010 at 1:29am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my ex-girlfriend, who is obviously still in love with me, is best friends with my mom. Now every time I come home, she is over. She even spent 4 hours helping us decorate our Christmas tree, and now she is telling my little sister about our love life. FML

#14185892
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29980) - you deserved it (4527)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:32am - love - by fordn4h - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years, the father of my son, has been the pervert who has been harassing my mother with weird texts and pictures of his knob. The cops told me after we went to the police station to report it and catch the creep. FML

#14185511
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28976) - you deserved it (3177)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:01am - intimacy - by grossed the f out -

Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years, the father of my son, has been the pervert who has been harassing my mother with weird texts and pictures of his knob. The cops told me after we went to the police station to report it and catch the creep. FML

#14185511
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28976) - you deserved it (3177)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:01am - intimacy - by grossed the f out -

Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years, the father of my son, has been the pervert who has been harassing my mother with weird texts and pictures of his knob. The cops told me after we went to the police station to report it and catch the creep. FML

#14185511
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28976) - you deserved it (3177)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:01am - intimacy - by grossed the f out -

Today, I asked my mother why she didn't drink. She laughed and said, "The last time I drank was the night you were conceived. I didn't need any other disasters." FML

#14180759
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32147) - you deserved it (3897)

On 12/12/2010 at 4:55pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my mother called to uninvite me from Christmas, my ex-wife is going and she doesn't want it to be awkward for her. FML

#14170475
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34203) - you deserved it (2342)

On 12/11/2010 at 8:55pm - misc - by kingkarnie - United States

Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML

#14169295
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26068) - you deserved it (7204)

On 12/11/2010 at 7:06pm - work - by stifledbyyou (woman) - United States (Louisiana)



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