Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Danielle2438

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

Danielle2438

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 18 April 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 384
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Danielle2438's page activity

Visits<b>vladimirnabokov</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 8:50pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 4:18pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 1:00pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 9:24am<b>kissaoneal13</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 8:40pm<b>jgtrflynn</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 6:47am<b>KayArGee</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 12:21am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 11/09/2010 at 3:05pm

Danielle2438's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Danielle2438's badges

Danielle2438's favorite FMLs

Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML

#20825918
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45460) - you deserved it (3625)

On 08/07/2013 at 6:00pm - misc - by hardee fucking har yourself, sir (man) - United Kingdom (Stockport)

Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML

#20559057
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33232) - you deserved it (4460)

On 03/25/2013 at 3:18am - animals - by Apes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML

#20559057
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33232) - you deserved it (4460)

On 03/25/2013 at 3:18am - animals - by Apes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting at the mall food court, and wearing a "Blink If You Want Me" shirt. A guy walked by, saw my shirt, and made a point of holding a staring contest with me before moving on. FML

#19139101
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11549) - you deserved it (36973)

On 02/22/2012 at 2:40pm - misc - by KittenNomNom - United States (Texas)

Today, I was speaking to an old friend and I asked her how her mother was. She replied, "She passed away, you came to her funeral last month." FML

#19121013
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8556) - you deserved it (40915)

On 02/20/2012 at 5:01am - misc - by elizabethyeo - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
437 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31974) - you deserved it (141511)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

#1104891
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (479381) - you deserved it (29244)

On 04/19/2009 at 12:05am - intimacy - by soontobedivorced (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

#1104891
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (479381) - you deserved it (29244)

On 04/19/2009 at 12:05am - intimacy - by soontobedivorced (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my first girlfriend of over 3 years left me for another guy. She said she's looking for someone who can financially provide for her in the future. The dude owns a T-Mobile kiosk. I'm going to medical school. FML

#341783
535 comments

I agree, your life sucks (501008) - you deserved it (34094)

On 03/15/2009 at 2:29pm - love - by thankskimi (man) - United States (New Jersey)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: