DanielT1994

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DanielT1994

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 November 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4447
  • Number of comments : 105
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About DanielT1994 : I'm well into my second semester at American River College. I'm working on learning Italian because my family doesn't speak it anymore. I plan on majoring in Criminal Justice. If I offend you, I do apologize; the comments I make are related to who I am, and I, as well as you are, am shaped by things that happen to me. I am a firm believer in God and our Lord Jesus Christ. I love video games and science fiction. I love animals, but they can be annoying. I can be cold, but I generally try to be a kind man. I mainly go on this application between 0600 and 0700 before class and then whenever else I can. Puns are my favorite type of joke. I'm a very sarcastic man. I have no sympathy for teenagers that disrespect their parents and the rules of the house. Stupidity can be very bothersome to me. I try to live by a moral code. If you would like to contact me, do as you wish.

DanielT1994's page activity

Visits<b>bolee997</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 4:19pm<b>Siorghra</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 10:27pm<b>runonionrun</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 2:45am<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 3:34pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 1:41pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 10:30am<b>ProgMetalMan</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 12:31am<b>Missythemini</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 6:21pm<b>dyehardxen</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 12:11pm<b>silon5</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 3:58pm<b>swick25</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 3:44pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 8:09am<b>Rababco</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 10:51pm<b>jeffandjeff</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 7:52pm<b>victoryzz</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 3:52am<b>AquanTheDragon</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 12:10am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 4:48pm<b>DeadpoolTheta</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 5:07pm

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DanielT1994's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a job interview with a person named Chris. The entire time I couldn't figure out if Chris was a man or woman. The interview went as good as it could have went. At the end I said, "Thank you very much sir." Wrong gender. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2009 at 12:18pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I was asking my one year old nephew what noises certain animals make. I decided to trick him and ask him what sound I make. He immediately says, "MOOOO". FML

by vballqt201 / 06/21/2009 at 12:03pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML

by anonyme / 06/20/2009 at 10:00pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to use fake tan, seeing as I am so pale. Everywhere I have been today, I have had children behind me. Singing the Oompa Loompa song. FML

by OompaLoompa / 06/18/2009 at 9:32am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, we were having a school prize giving. I heard my name called and I walked up to the stage waving and smiling, feeling rather proud of myself. I stood by the microphone and started my acceptance speech, only to be tapped on the shoulder by the girl they actually called up. FML

by Jessey / 06/18/2009 at 9:05am / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Miscellaneous

Today, we were having a school prize giving. I heard my name called and I walked up to the stage waving and smiling, feeling rather proud of myself. I stood by the microphone and started my acceptance speech, only to be tapped on the shoulder by the girl they actually called up. FML

by Jessey / 06/18/2009 at 9:05am / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Miscellaneous

Today, we were having a school prize giving. I heard my name called and I walked up to the stage waving and smiling, feeling rather proud of myself. I stood by the microphone and started my acceptance speech, only to be tapped on the shoulder by the girl they actually called up. FML

by Jessey / 06/18/2009 at 9:05am / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was running with my sister's dog. It had the brilliant idea of shooting between my legs and I immediately faceplanted on the cement. I now have a swollen nose and cuts all over my body. I'm a grown man who does martial arts and I got beat up by a dog the size of a baby. FML

by Broken / 06/17/2009 at 10:12am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was at my job at an old folks home, and I was cleaning off a table when one old lady looks up at me and says "I've been a dirty dirty girl" in a seductive tone, I thought she meant about the table so I said "yes you have" then she winked at me, I walked away fast. FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2009 at 3:53am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2009 at 11:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought my cat a nice big bag of expensive anti-hairball catfood, so she'd stop puking hairballs on my things. After eating it, she started running around wildly, howling and projectile vomiting on EVERYTHING. FML

by Jay / 06/06/2009 at 9:17am / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I dreamed that I met this beautiful girl at a restaurant and we ended up having lunch together. Everything was going perfect until the end when I tried to get her number and she wouldn't give it to me. I can't even get a girl in my dreams. FML

by xpxp2002 / 05/27/2009 at 5:48am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I took my grandma to the hospital to visit her estranged husband who she hasn't seen in years. After a thoroughly disasterous visit, we're waiting in the carpark and my gran strokes my face and tells me I have a lot of facial hair. I thought she was going to thank me. And I'm a girl. FML

by Anonymous / 05/23/2009 at 9:41pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was desperately handing out resumes. I came to my local grocery store and asked for a job application, the customer service rep told me all she needed was my resume. I smiled and gave it to her only to see her read it, laugh and put it straight in the garbage as I walked out. FML

by nojob / 05/07/2009 at 3:15pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. When the police officer approached me and asked for license and registration, I accidentally gave him my fake I.D. FML

by FakeID / 05/06/2009 at 4:05pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation