Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 10/05/2014 at 9:09pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4075
  • Number of comments : 184
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About DahkLohd : I don't have a nose.

DahkLohd's page activity

Visits<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 12:28am<b>A_Rabid_Dear</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 1:06pm<b>HugoVanHeisan</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 6:02pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 2:51am<b>weedle99</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 3:29pm<b>__nines</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 10:35pm<b>mauguster</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 11:52pm<b>MarkTheMintMan</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 12:06pm<b>AndyPurdy</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 3:19am<b>deltaninetwo</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 5:14pm<b>Zufallian</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 12:33pm<b>Crazynocatlady</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 1:53am<b>soveryunoriginal</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 8:12am<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 4:38am<b>Nail7777</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 2:00am<b>daGun</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 7:33am<b>klawzor</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 1:54am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 2:32pm

Fucked!<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 6:28am<b>MarkTheMintMan</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 6:06pm<b>soveryunoriginal</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 2:12pm<b>klawzor</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 7:54am<b>CitricAcid</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:50am<b>sevazilla</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 4:36am<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 12:57pm<b>cadillacgal79</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 2:15am<b>RoseBlack123</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 4:56pm<b>brittsteele</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 10:01pm<b>dposspan</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 6:04pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:37pm<b>I_Am_Lamp_</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 6:53am<b>thederpylemon</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 4:23am<b>JetSnipe42</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 2:18am<b>russell1470</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 6:30pm

DahkLohd's FML badges


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of DahkLohd's badges

DahkLohd's favorite FMLs

Today, I went over to welcome this new couple to our subdivision with a bottle of wine and muffins. I told them I liked what they were doing with the place, then asked them when they had moved in. They replied, "Two years ago." FML


I agree, your life sucks (7688) - you deserved it (35730)

On 12/14/2010 at 10:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to feed my neighbor's cat while he was out of town. The cat was sick, so part of my job was to give it a pill each time I came. Cats don't like swallowing pills. My neighbor forgot to mention that his cat wasn't declawed. I was wearing shorts. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25736) - you deserved it (5907)

On 12/14/2010 at 6:52am - health - by anonymous - United States

Today, I got a call from a restricted number. When I answered, it was a prank call. The kids on the other end had porn on high volume and put the phone next to the speaker. Way to remind me that I'm still a virgin. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31367) - you deserved it (7515)

On 12/14/2010 at 6:00am - intimacy - by virginat16 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML


I agree, your life sucks (44271) - you deserved it (10611)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was in the car with my mom. We were discussing my brother, how he's been screwing up majorly lately and she blamed it on his friends. Then she turned to me and said, "It's a good thing you've never had any friends." FML


I agree, your life sucks (30872) - you deserved it (3749)

On 12/13/2010 at 11:29am - misc - by Amanda - United States

Today, I asked my mother why she didn't drink. She laughed and said, "The last time I drank was the night you were conceived. I didn't need any other disasters." FML


I agree, your life sucks (37519) - you deserved it (4402)

On 12/12/2010 at 4:55pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after months of trying, my wife of seven years told me she is finally pregnant. I'm going to be an uncle. FML


I agree, your life sucks (67181) - you deserved it (3409)

On 01/06/2010 at 10:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

FML's blog

  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: