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Today, I bought a new mailbox to replace the old one that was stolen. Two hours after I put the new mailbox up, the old one was back and the new one was missing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38985) - you totally deserved it (1585)
On 06/20/2009 at 2:01am - misc - by Dumbass - United States (Florida)
Today, I facebooked my friends about my upcoming birthday party, and told them to keep the date free. I got several responses telling me that's not possible, because that's the day the new Harry Potter movie comes out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29787) - you totally deserved it (15797)
On 06/16/2009 at 7:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, is the day my husband was supposed to come home from a six month tour at sea. I heard the door bell ring. I sprinted to the door expecting to hold my honey bear, instead two uniformed sailors with a folded flag greeted me. I burst into tears. My husband walked up behind me. He laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (127636) - you totally deserved it (9641)
On 05/10/2009 at 9:18pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I told my parents that I was going out with my boyfriend and they agreed to let me go as long as I was home by midnight. Did I come home on time? Yes. Was my shirt right side out? No. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14138) - you totally deserved it (72590)
On 05/10/2009 at 4:25pm - intimacy - by insideout (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I didn't have any money to buy a tampon from the dispenser at my school but my hands are small enough so I can just slide them up and grab one. My hand got stuck in the dispenser and my school had to call the fire department. Now everyone calls me tampon girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20470) - you totally deserved it (43046)
On 04/30/2009 at 3:56pm - misc - by obeezy (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, a telemarketer called for my dad. Jokingly, I said, "I haven't seen him for like five days...I'm starting to get worried," in my best child-like voice. Apparently the telemarketer called Child Protective Services. I'm 20. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9082) - you totally deserved it (41926)
On 04/30/2009 at 2:03pm - misc - by Telemistake (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was on my way home when I saw a cop hiding behind a Budget truck. I immediately slowed down and prayed that he wouldn't give me a ticket. Then I realized I was walking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16183) - you totally deserved it (61262)
On 04/30/2009 at 1:41pm - misc - by kas (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house.I've been a vegetarian for 4 years, and his mother made lasagna with meat in it. After telling her I don't eat meat, my boyfriend's father proceeds to say "we know who's meat she does eat." My boyfriend, his mother, and I were standing right there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53657) - you totally deserved it (5767)
On 04/29/2009 at 10:09pm - intimacy - by ohmyx3 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I spotted one of my close friends using the ATM outside our school's university center. I decided to creep up behind him, grab his shoulders abruptly, and shouted in my best deep man voice "give me all your money!". Turned out to be a poor, unsuspecting freshman. He gave me his money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6577) - you totally deserved it (43856)
On 04/22/2009 at 10:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML
I agree, your life sucks (58299) - you totally deserved it (4567)
On 04/19/2009 at 10:09pm - health - by Litterbox (woman) - United States (Texas)
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