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Cthulu

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Cthulu

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1509
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Cthulu's page activity

Visits<b>Ajkrumen</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 2:46pm<b>kkt1209</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 6:56pm<b>azelk</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 11:30pm<b>ItsKennyBaby</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 12:27am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 7:31am<b>valabruquah</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 1:51pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 12:58pm<b>daruther</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 3:27pm<b>PabloThePancake</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 12:53am<b>allie2590</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 6:12pm<b>Waspinator1998</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 1:22am<b>GarrettP28</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 2:00am<b>PsychoticAsylum</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 3:46pm<b>KatieMajestic</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 1:43am<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 2:32am<b>goawayy</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 3:33pm<b>Captain_Wyatt</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 3:27pm<b>Tari</b> - the 04/08/2013 at 10:54pm

Cthulu's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Cthulu's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making schnitzel at our kitchen so I had to get rid of all the oil. So I decided it would be best to put the hot pan on our porch so the oil would cool down and then I could get rid of it. Unfortunately the ground is sealed with tar, so the tar melted and now the pan is stuck to the ground. FML

#8583652
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7367) - you deserved it (25529)

On 02/23/2010 at 7:54am - health - by peterpan (man) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, I returned home to find that my boyfriend's dog had gotten into the garbage and ripped all my used pads to shreds. There's a trail of Always tatters leading to his dog bed, and blood everywhere. My blood. Oh God. FML

#8435501
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31898) - you deserved it (3084)

On 02/19/2010 at 3:24am - animals - by OMGraven (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, after recently having had surgery, I Iearnt that some extra tissue was needed to cover up the hole in the roof of my mouth. Where did they get this tissue? From a dead person. I now have the flesh of a dead person in my mouth, which by the way is now infected. FML

#8361510
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37490) - you deserved it (3211)

On 02/17/2010 at 12:07am - health - by Sophie - United States (Texas)

Today, in a sporting goods store, my mom walked over to the other side of the store, when a cute guy came over to talk to me. When she saw this she grabbed a bat, walked over to us and said "If you ever even look at my daughter again, I will beat you shitless." She was serious. He ran. FML

#8354648
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29584) - you deserved it (2215)

On 02/16/2010 at 9:54pm - misc - by batter--up (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was in class and noticed that it smelled strongly of cat urine. I smelled my shoulder and realized that my cat had peed on my sweater. I had six hours of classes left, and the smell had permeated my shirt. FML

#8094791
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21115) - you deserved it (5398)

On 02/10/2010 at 4:19pm - animals - by snickerdoodles (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was in class and noticed that it smelled strongly of cat urine. I smelled my shoulder and realized that my cat had peed on my sweater. I had six hours of classes left, and the smell had permeated my shirt. FML

#8094791
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21115) - you deserved it (5398)

On 02/10/2010 at 4:19pm - animals - by snickerdoodles (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went for a job interview I scheduled 3 weeks ago. I spent $200 on a new suit to really impress them and practised like crazy every imaginable question they could ask. They already had filled the position 2 weeks ago and forgot to inform me. FML

#7844217
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27498) - you deserved it (2430)

On 02/03/2010 at 11:06am - misc - by kristine29 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML

#7339757
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27327) - you deserved it (4940)

On 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by scubai (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I met some guys from my dad's workplace. They told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded, "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML

#5857727
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33194) - you deserved it (6771)

On 10/16/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by SheWentCrayola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I finally plucked up the courage to propose to my girlfriend of 7 months. I took her out to the park where we had our first kiss, I got down on one knee, and before I could say "Will you marry me" a bird shat on my head. FML

#5755233
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43268) - you deserved it (6373)

On 10/10/2009 at 8:52am - love - by -bird-poop- (man) - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I urgently needed to use the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. When I went to flush, it would not go down the pipes. After about ten panic filled minutes, I notice the cat litter box. I carefully scoop out my logs, and bury them in the cat litter. FML

#5325654
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18125) - you deserved it (45180)

On 09/18/2009 at 12:29am - animals - by Poowee (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my mom was criticizing how I can't handle taking care of any living thing because I'm too irresponsible. We had a huge argument so I went back to my apartment, only to find that my fish had died. I forgot I had a fish. FML

#5286860
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6779) - you deserved it (54153)

On 09/16/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by FlipYoC (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had my first real date with my first serious boyfriend. I was nervous because from past experience. I learned my lips were a bit ticklish and I usually giggled a bit during kissing. Well, we started making out and I thought was I doing pretty good hiding my laughs. Until I wet myself. FML

#4819197
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45074) - you deserved it (9642)

On 08/25/2009 at 7:56pm - love - by RitaDahhlinnnng (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I thought it was a good idea to go number two while smoking a "cigarette". My ash tray was over by the sink so I decided to just ash in the toilet. While ashing between my legs, I sneezed and now I have a extremely uncomfortable burn on my man member. Smoking is bad. FML

#3821134
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7750) - you deserved it (82284)

On 07/17/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was involved in a car accident. I wasn't the driver of either car. I happened to be a passerby that was hit by a falling stop sign as a car hit it. FML

#3660807
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51124) - you deserved it (2352)

On 07/11/2009 at 3:43am - misc - by ttsutaoka (man) - United States (California)



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