Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

CrimsonNightmare

Search for a member

CrimsonNightmare

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2447
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About CrimsonNightmare : Every person has their demons to deal with, I just happen to have a few more than most. Untill I\\\'m done with them, I\\\'ll continue living this nightmare.

CrimsonNightmare's page activity

Visits<b>bryan1271999</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 9:24pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 3:41pm<b>xBangOut</b> - the 06/22/2011 at 7:02pm<b>TheCaptain88</b> - the 01/27/2011 at 9:45pm

CrimsonNightmare's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

CrimsonNightmare's favorite FMLs

Today, while walking home, the gods were kind enough to grace me with the sight of an old man jogging past me in nothing but a pair of short shorts. The image of his balls swinging to and fro underneath like a pendulum has been forever burned into my retinas. FML

#17298408
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29441) - you deserved it (4847)

On 07/29/2011 at 2:26pm - misc - by someone - United States

Today, my entire family, myself included, has been turned into a collective diarrhea fountain after going out to eat. We only have one bathroom. FML

#17288332
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31199) - you deserved it (2645)

On 07/28/2011 at 4:37pm - health - by shroooms (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, I was sleeping like a baby on our living room couch. My older brother and his friends lit my slippers on fire. While I was wearing them. They even took a video. FML

#17261377
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30590) - you deserved it (3022)

On 07/26/2011 at 12:03am - misc - by Ep1cF4ce - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I walked in on my mom and her friends comparing the differences in their nipples. FML

#17211099
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35973) - you deserved it (3696)

On 07/22/2011 at 12:11am - misc - by oliverP123 - United States (New York)

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

#17207993
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44268) - you deserved it (4680)

On 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm - money - by iwantmoney - United States (Ohio)

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

#17206347
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40973) - you deserved it (10093)

On 07/21/2011 at 5:24pm - love - by toni405 - United States

Today, I slipped and fell in mud while running from the car to inside to avoid getting wet in a torrential downpour. I was running from the limo, in my wedding dress, to the church for my wedding. FML

#17184775
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56010) - you deserved it (6966)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:26am - love - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML

#17182524
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33560) - you deserved it (7086)

On 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went over to my girlfriend's house to meet her entire family for the first time. Trying not to be rude, I ate their 12-bean and chorizo soup. Now I'm stuck in the bathroom trying to unclog the toilet with no plunger. FML

#17177083
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37398) - you deserved it (4712)

On 07/19/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by PissNTra - United States

Today, I learned that when you piss on a hornets' nest from a window, the hornets will go after the source of the stream. It can also cause you to fall through your friend's second story window. FML

#17176803
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8914) - you deserved it (67034)

On 07/19/2011 at 12:41pm - misc - by freakfreak12345 - United States (Maine)

Today, my mom gave me the "birds and the bees" talk, while she was taking a dump. FML

#17172362
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31469) - you deserved it (2979)

On 07/19/2011 at 1:42am - misc - by KidCudi227 - United States (Arizona)

Today, my step dad stole over $400 worth of savings from me. He spent it on alcohol, fireworks, and a very large sombrero. FML

#17161191
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34714) - you deserved it (3669)

On 07/18/2011 at 9:08am - misc - by _TaToRtOt_ (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she thought I was cheating on her. With my own sister. FML

#17153294
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43852) - you deserved it (3874)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:04pm - intimacy - by Cinnamon (man) - Jamaica (Saint Andrew)

Today, I accidentally deep throated a fork. FML

#17150480
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17295) - you deserved it (34375)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:15pm - intimacy - by CaoiiBieber - Ireland

Today, I had to endure a long story about how and why my brother shaves his pubes. FML

#17148307
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29415) - you deserved it (4358)

On 07/17/2011 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Username - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: