About CorruptAngel920 : I'm just an average guy using the FML app. Sorry in advance if I get typos, I tend not to use predictive text / auto correct
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, I'm a nanny. After the kids went to bed the dog wouldn't stop barking violently unless I held the end of a blanket for him to hump. I need a raise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26104) - you deserved it (2325)
On 06/19/2011 at 1:19am - work - by fattymcbutterpants - United States
Today, my football coach thought it would be a good idea to get drunk, run to the other sideline, and scream, "WELCOME TO SPARTA, BITCH!" This would've been funny if he weren't also my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29066) - you deserved it (2841)
On 04/28/2011 at 6:28am - misc - by spartanson -
Today, my father who left my family over 10 years ago and never contacted us or paid child support, poked me on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50364) - you deserved it (2888)
On 03/05/2011 at 7:24pm - misc - by poked - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I wanted to annoy my sister by playing the air horn app on my iPhone. I forgot that I had headphones in. Let's just say I quickly had to change my underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6701) - you deserved it (54636)
On 02/01/2011 at 1:50pm - misc - by Brea - United States (Missouri)
Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58013) - you deserved it (2755)
On 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I learned that what happens in Vegas doesn't always stay in Vegas. This includes my one night stand who turned up outside my front door with a suitcase in her hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14216) - you deserved it (29179)
On 12/09/2010 at 7:31am - intimacy - by NeverDrinkingAgain - Canada
Today, I learned that in Japan there are monkeys that wait tables and work at a tavern. Literally, I have a job a monkey can do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22543) - you deserved it (3965)
On 03/16/2010 at 11:30am - work - by slickboy0023 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I learned that if you stare at your cat and her eyes suddenly get really big, it means she's going to maul your face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11836) - you deserved it (20755)
On 11/18/2009 at 4:01pm - animals - by nycplywood (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, the traffic court judge didn't believe my three witnesses and two security cameras that proved I was innocent. He claimed a cop would never lie, and that the dashboard security cameras, which the cop brought in, were somehow edited by me. I was fined $1,000 and my license was suspended. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43761) - you deserved it (1676)
On 10/09/2009 at 9:58pm - misc - by thelistman (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9729) - you deserved it (53692)
On 09/10/2009 at 7:17pm - love - by itisthedude (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17854) - you deserved it (41590)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version
Today, I realized that a Ph.D. in Mechanical Engineering does not offer enough knowledge and experience to accomplish some simple, everyday tasks. I have spent the last 12 years designing large robots to scour the seabed for shipwrecks yet the mechanism used to unhook a bra eludes me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40457) - you deserved it (14345)
On 06/30/2009 at 10:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, me and my co-workers were playing with the Helium tank we got today. We were all giggling like little girls for the better half of 15 minutes. I don't know what is more sad, that a bunch of guys were sucking helium instead of working, or that the youngest guy in the group is 43. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36391) - you deserved it (10073)
On 05/20/2009 at 11:42am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, one of my three-year-old twin daughters asked, "Dad, can we get a cat?" I replied in a gentle dad voice, "No, honey, dad is allergic to cats. That means they make him sneeze and sniffle. So we can't get a cat. Sorry." After a slight pause, the other asked, "When you die can we get a cat?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (53875) - you deserved it (4291)
On 05/14/2009 at 11:24am - kids - by TwinDad (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was playing one on one soccer with a girl like. I accidentally kicked the ball right into her face. The ball rolled back towards me and as I was running to see if she was ok, I kicked the ball... right into her face again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56214) - you deserved it (22801)
On 04/29/2009 at 10:35am - misc - by hyper12332 (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Monday 20 May 2013
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