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Contravene

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Contravene

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 August 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1309
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Contravene : I'm not really one for self-description. If you really want to know anything about me, just ask.

Contravene's page activity

Visits<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 1:37pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:53pm<b>thaliah</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 11:55am<b>Kalipczo</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 5:27am<b>carleybeak</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 3:58pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 10:46pm<b>tralala453</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 2:47pm<b>iLynz</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 10:20pm<b>capslockisgood</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 12:52am<b>JinxedPixie</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 1:19pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 05/18/2013 at 1:25pm<b>Dreamer4094</b> - the 05/15/2013 at 2:44pm<b>arsenicalhumor</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 9:26pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 6:49pm<b>hulioverede</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 6:10pm<b>mattdlv</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 12:23am<b>XistingPrince</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 10:39pm<b>TomPusslicker</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 7:53am

Contravene's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Contravene's badges

Contravene's favorite FMLs

Today, while at a boring lecture, I heard some people behind me whispering and laughing. I turned around, wondering what was so funny, which made them laugh even more. I then realised it looked like I'd been giving my pen a blowjob for the last 10 minutes. FML

#15386188
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19171) - you deserved it (31672)

On 03/19/2011 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by gayboii (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I found out that when I orgasm, my increased heart rate causes me to pass out. I also found out my boyfriend doesn't stop when I'm unconscious. FML

#15379416
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52826) - you deserved it (7773)

On 03/19/2011 at 6:32am - intimacy - by anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my father came over to my house. I realized there were condoms on the table, so I subtly moved a vase to hide them. He then gave me an unamused look and said "I know you have sex. You've been married for nine years. Grow the fuck up, dumbass." FML

#15356314
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18200) - you deserved it (82832)

On 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I auditioned for my school's production of Romeo and Juliet. When they announced that I got the part as Juliet, all the guys auditioning for Romeo suddenly disappeared. FML

#15260385
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41040) - you deserved it (5386)

On 03/10/2011 at 7:36am - misc - by Juliet -

Today, after setting up surveillance in my front yard to see who's dog keeps crapping on my lawn, I finally caught the culprit on film. It was my heroin addict neighbour. FML

#15260051
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36409) - you deserved it (3211)

On 03/10/2011 at 6:09am - animals - by Tom -

Today, I bought my fiancée a dress for her birthday. She accused me of saying she was fat, because I bought it in medium rather than small. After trying on the dress, she's now not only mad at me for buying it, but also because the dress fits perfectly. FML

#15252423
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42166) - you deserved it (4088)

On 03/09/2011 at 5:27pm - love - by drebel (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was told that I will never be able to have children. Thankfully for my husband, his girlfriend sure can. FML

#15252326
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47227) - you deserved it (3241)

On 03/09/2011 at 5:08pm - love - by sosad -

Today, I flipped out when I saw a centipede. I screamed, very loudly and in a very high voice. My girlfriend came into the room, stomped on it, picked it up and threw it in the trashcan. I apologized to her for the scene and all she said was, "I'm used to it." FML

#15228646
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10820) - you deserved it (36932)

On 03/07/2011 at 11:17am - misc - by thenotsomanlyman - United States

Today, it's official, we measured. My boyfriend's manboobs are bigger than my breasts. FML

#15225525
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48887) - you deserved it (10069)

On 03/07/2011 at 1:16am - health - by tinygirl -

Today, my boyfriend told me he was taking me out to eat to his favorite restaurant. He said I could order whatever I wanted and he'd pay for it. He took me to Red Lobster, knowing full well that I'm allergic to seafood. FML

#15222879
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35089) - you deserved it (4151)

On 03/06/2011 at 10:00pm - love - by pinchy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that the demonic voice that made me nearly piss myself all night, was my sister's Furby she stuck in the closet. FML

#15219004
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36631) - you deserved it (6534)

On 03/06/2011 at 2:38pm - misc - by Spooked (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, we had to discuss our heritage at school. When I told the class that I am German, Japanese, and of the Jewish faith, the teacher loudly laughs at the "irony." Something like this happens whenever I tell people my background. FML

#15213017
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33064) - you deserved it (4857)

On 03/06/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

#15209845
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37302) - you deserved it (3365)

On 03/05/2011 at 8:42pm - health - by nick (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

#15205288
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52339) - you deserved it (4404) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/05/2011 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous - France (Alsace)

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

#15203950
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36643) - you deserved it (12466)

On 03/05/2011 at 1:55am - misc - by insomnitude (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



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