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Collisionn

Offline (the 10/21/2014 at 4:25am) | Search for a member

Collisionn

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3171
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Collisionn's page activity

Visits<b>Mornai</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 12:33pm<b>Here4theshow</b> - the 03/03/2013 at 11:56pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 03/02/2013 at 4:51am<b>Dany93</b> - the 03/02/2013 at 3:08am<b>Tari</b> - the 03/02/2013 at 2:56am<b>abbeyXD</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 11:40pm<b>XxQueenofPuppets</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 8:46pm<b>vina88</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 8:24pm<b>ride2hip93</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 7:14pm<b>spencer4</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 6:55pm<b>superrocket19</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 6:08pm<b>Budderchook</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 5:01pm<b>Angio113</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 4:59pm<b>TheShyCreeper</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 4:37pm<b>PyroTim</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 4:28pm<b>deerhugger</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 3:38pm<b>Schmekey</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 3:18pm<b>zobo1014</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 3:09pm

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Collisionn's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

#20691071
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63375) - you deserved it (14432)

On 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time when her mother unexpectedly came home. In the rush to get dressed, we accidentally put on each other's shirts. Her mom noticed. FML

#20670515
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51446) - you deserved it (19606)

On 05/18/2013 at 8:54am - intimacy - by lez probs - United States

Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking for them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out and threw soccer balls in my face. FML

#20556944
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38120) - you deserved it (4759)

On 03/23/2013 at 7:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39198) - you deserved it (10355)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, as a firefighter, we were called to assist the ambulance crew with lifting a deceased patient out of a house. Little did I know, he had been dead inside for 3 weeks, and was bloated and popped like a water balloon when we attempted to move him. My girlfriend made soup for the evening meal. FML

#20488428
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38418) - you deserved it (2162)

On 01/31/2013 at 11:39pm - work - by Fireguy92 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after spending a lot of money on photo shoots to build up my portfolio, I finally got an offer from a modelling agency. I ran outside to tell my parents, only for my brother to hurl an iced snowball straight into my face. I now have a huge gash over my cheek and nose. FML

#20428566
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38443) - you deserved it (4022)

On 12/28/2012 at 8:23pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, it's been 13 months since I've been living in the States. I've been called a Nazi, asked if we have electricity in Germany, and been made fun of the way I speak with my "German accent", the list goes on. I'm not even German, I'm Danish. FML

#20201491
410 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39731) - you deserved it (2440)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:45am - kids - by LearnGeographyUSA (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I smiled at a new kid and started a conversation with him, just to be nice. He later sent me 24 messages describing how strong his love for me is. I'm scared to go to school tomorrow. FML

#20200101
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29946) - you deserved it (3288)

On 12/11/2012 at 3:39am - love - by you're just creepy. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, after being a germaphobe for almost ten years and refusing to go out to restaurants because of it, I finally had the courage to face my fear, and went to dinner with my family. After three bites into my salad, I found a dead bug in it. FML

#20150517
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27660) - you deserved it (2862)

On 11/06/2012 at 1:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I woke up and looked over to see the "beautiful girl" I slept with last night. Turns out it was the obsessive girl from my class with a man-face I had avoided all semester. In conclusion, beer goggles are very real and very powerful. FML

#20149916
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11100) - you deserved it (40913)

On 11/06/2012 at 12:15am - intimacy - by coolguy (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my parents gave me a sock and card for my eighteenth birthday. The card said, "Now that Dobby is free, get out." FML

#20118693
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27891) - you deserved it (3430)

On 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I walked into the kitchen at 5 am, to have my 7 and 9 year olds throw a bucket of water on me. To their surprise and horror, I didn't melt. FML

#20116347
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22717) - you deserved it (3067)

On 10/14/2012 at 10:57am - kids - by Nickki - United States

Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML

#20116072
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23315) - you deserved it (4277)

On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)

Today, just for old time's sake, I decided to jump on my bed. I ended up hitting my head on the spinning fan and knocking myself unconscious. FML

#20114543
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9722) - you deserved it (30584)

On 10/13/2012 at 2:45am - health - by lalalalainie - United States (California)

Today, I wanted to surprise my long distance girlfriend by flying to her unannounced. When I arrived at her house, her family tells me that she herself boarded an unannounced flight to where I lived hours ago. Surprise. FML

#20103950
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33085) - you deserved it (3637)

On 10/06/2012 at 6:04am - love - by Jex (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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