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CoconutOil's favorite FMLs
Today, I took my first shower in weeks after having had spinal surgery. My sister flushed a toilet. I couldn't reach the nozzle or my cane to get off the shower bench, and all I could do was sit there as scalding hot water sprayed all over me. FML
by Ouchies / 02/09/2012 at 12:28pm / United States (Colorado) / Health
by vampire / 06/16/2011 at 4:53pm / United Kingdom (Wigan) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/16/2011 at 12:14am / United States (Minnesota) / Health
Today, I was at the mall blasting music. I was wearing a nice shirt, and had my iPod in my breast pocket. I noticed a cute girl smiling at me, so I smiled back and as she started to walk over, I turned down my music while smiling. It looked like I was rubbing my nipple. FML
by zero_minded12 / 05/20/2009 at 11:08pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
Today, I was coaching a little league soccer game. I was telling one of my players to go cover another kid. I said "go cover the little yellow kid!" because he happened to be wearing a yellow shirt. He also happened to be Asian. I then got death stares from his family members. FML
by Anonymous / 05/17/2009 at 9:48am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
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- Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She… Today, an hour after having been turned down for sex, I walked in on my wife fingering herself to a… Today, while I was hanging out with a cute girl, I slapped her ass playfully. She told me that she…