About ClussmyLilFreak : WHAT? WHAT?
I'm not a very active FML'er, I mostly just read them and read the comments until I get bored but why don't you excite me and send me a message? xP
I'm 16, I live in Aruba.. I play drums, keyboard, piano, learning how to sing (and failing miserably so far) and I really really really like hamsters and I'm a SUCKER for McDonalds and I'm magically still not fat. :')
Anyway, yah, that's it, sorry, I suck at these things. Do whatever you want now, go go o.o
About ClussmyLilFreak : WHAT? WHAT?
ClussmyLilFreak's FML badges
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
ClussmyLilFreak's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/06/2011 at 12:59pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Wisconsin love / 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy
by Heyy / 11/24/2010 at 12:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML
by Anonymous / 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML
by Anonymous / 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by awilson / 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML
by mandy / 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Love
by Michelle / 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
by treegirl / 07/26/2009 at 1:57am / United States / Love
Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML
by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy
Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML
by Cail / 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML
by Flicker / 05/14/2009 at 3:23am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by aviators / 04/07/2009 at 2:37pm / United States (Virginia) / Work
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML
by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- « Previous page
- Next page »
- Today, being a nurse's daughter, I got used to get rid of my pimples by the use of needles. I never… Today, I missed points on a visual inspection at work. Being the manager, I stayed after close the… Today, is my 22nd birthday. Including my best friend and boyfriend, everybody forgot. Well, except…