About CloudEnvy : As bouncy as a brick. As flammable as a stone. As round as a square. As complex as a bad joke. As imprisoned as a free man. As inspiring as writer's block. As well dressed as a nudist. As popular as a pariah. As sweet as a lemon. As conductive as mud. As cursed as a damaged mind.
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[Zebrasofa13 probably regrets saving my life by now.]
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-Keep me closer, i'm a lazy dancer, when you move I move with you.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35146) - you deserved it (11257)
On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, when I was laying in my bed, I looked on the opposite side and saw a spider the size of my palm staring at me. And if that wasn't bad, I found out it hops. I still can't find it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21980) - you deserved it (1105)
On 06/08/2012 at 7:13pm - misc - by somebody - United States (Maryland)
Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25686) - you deserved it (3780)
On 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm - intimacy - by anon - United Kingdom
Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22751) - you deserved it (1762)
On 11/13/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, as I was walking back to my dorm, I looked down and thought "I wonder why the ground is wet in just this one spot." Then I got hit with a water balloon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19931) - you deserved it (3325)
On 11/06/2011 at 11:50pm - misc - by Kirby - United States (Ohio)
Today, I locked myself out of my own shop. And I'm a locksmith. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25113) - you deserved it (7806)
On 10/29/2011 at 10:07am - work - by joser6969 - United States
Today, at work, my boss stared at me from behind while I was making hand gestures and noises at a toaster. I was pretending to be Magneto. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6819) - you deserved it (19564)
On 09/02/2011 at 3:48am - work - by dragos_dgt (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)
Today, I took my Catholic girlfriend home to meet my family for the first time. My brother thought it would be civil to spend over an hour insulting her religion and explaining in detail the many ways in which "the Force" is superior. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23016) - you deserved it (4596)
On 08/19/2011 at 6:36pm - love - by Jace - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)
Today, I introduced my parrot to oranges. Now she makes a high pitched scream if I don't give her any, and I've just run out of oranges. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20246) - you deserved it (7660)
On 08/16/2011 at 11:00am - misc - by bursteardrums (woman) - United Kingdom (Devon)
Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28878) - you deserved it (8538)
On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I told my mother I have a girlfriend. Her first answer was "Does she know?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (30816) - you deserved it (3731)
On 04/05/2011 at 8:00pm - misc - by notacreeper -
Today, I was waiting for the bus while wearing my FML shirt. A passer-by stopped, stared at me for a moment, and said, "I agree, your life sucks." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22248) - you deserved it (42445) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 03/28/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by Danou - Sent from mobile version
Today, I finally got the courage to say to my boyfriend that I feel invisible and ignored. To this he said 'You aren't invisible, I mean, look at that nose.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (30212) - you deserved it (5712)
On 03/18/2011 at 8:36am - love - by anon -
Today, while sleeping, I heard an explosion. My neighbor then knocked on my door and informed me that he had just hit my car with shrapnel from a cannon. Not only do I not have a car to drive, but I also have to put this claim on my insurance due to my neighbor being on welfare. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22730) - you deserved it (1769)
On 03/05/2011 at 7:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I got a parking ticket in the mail. I don't have a car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28568) - you deserved it (2205)
On 02/14/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by Roxas (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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