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Clarinetrox

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Clarinetrox
  • Town/Country : Port Perry, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 29 July 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 881
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About Clarinetrox : Absolutely love this site; check it daily to brighten my day.

Clarinetrox's last visitors

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Clarinetrox's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of Clarinetrox's badges

Clarinetrox's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally summed up the courage to break up with my abusively controlling girlfriend. I don't know what I was thinking, but instead of leaving as a free man, I left as an engaged one. FML

#19705817
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14930) - you deserved it (37858)

On 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, I figured out why my doctor repeatedly warned me to keep regular bowel movements while I recover from childbirth. I now have an anal fissure. It's like giving birth all over again. FML

#19705256
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17592) - you deserved it (3477)

On 05/30/2012 at 4:25pm - health - by Terri-Lynn (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
472 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38417) - you deserved it (3081)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

#19603084
408 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55165) - you deserved it (2954)

On 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, against my wishes, my son snuck out of my house to go partying. When he came home, I called him in so I could properly discipline him. While I was talking, he staggered to our fish tank, pulled open the lid, and vomited straight into it. FML

#19592995
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23487) - you deserved it (4431)

On 05/08/2012 at 4:48pm - kids - by A-64 (man) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, I woke up super glued to the toilet. FML

#19420355
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20675) - you deserved it (7158)

On 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm - misc - by Tanner - United States (Oregon)

Today, I'm recovering from colon surgery. They gave me codeine as pain relief, which has made me constipated. I'm currently sat on the toilet, trying to push out what feels like a small child wrapped in barbed wire out without busting my stitches. FML

#19405476
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27277) - you deserved it (1587)

On 04/04/2012 at 6:13am - health - by screaming monkey - United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead)

Today, I walked in on a homeless guy peeing on a turd on the floor of the women's restroom at the park. I'm a janitor for the city. FML

#19393647
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18308) - you deserved it (1395)

On 04/02/2012 at 4:38am - work - by minimum wage (man) - Canada

Today, I walked in on a homeless guy peeing on a turd on the floor of the women's restroom at the park. I'm a janitor for the city. FML

#19393647
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18308) - you deserved it (1395)

On 04/02/2012 at 4:38am - work - by minimum wage (man) - Canada

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML

#19239456
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13663) - you deserved it (48302)

On 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm - intimacy - by Fraser - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I received a letter from the state saying my 14-year-old daughter is now legally recognized as a male. I have no idea what happened. FML

#18766108
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36765) - you deserved it (3391)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - India

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19011) - you deserved it (37894)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

#18531059
182 comments

Today, stepping on a scale for the first time in years, I had to lift up my stomach to see the number. FML

#18520794
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10635) - you deserved it (36500)

On 12/15/2011 at 4:52pm - health - by ms piggy - United States

Today, my cat vomited violently. I can smell it but I can't find it. FML

#18520750
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27794) - you deserved it (2864)

On 12/15/2011 at 4:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (South Australia)



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