CitizenSnipz

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CitizenSnipz

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4597
  • Number of comments : 317
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

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CitizenSnipz's page activity

Visits<b>jemmamacdonald11</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 8:54am<b>TheBlackMagister</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 3:02pm<b>BananEnigma</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 4:42pm<b>winded</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 5:19pm<b>rivimatt</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 9:59am<b>FuentezFam</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 5:15am<b>red812</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 8:40pm<b>OspreyEagle</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 5:22pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 10:48pm<b>fourth_line_dust</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 9:41am<b>Pop_And_Lock</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 12:00am<b>TheChickenLord</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 12:04pm<b>kmaheynoway</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 3:45pm<b>jshakd642</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 3:51pm<b>Chrissyella</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 12:36am<b>ShatteredPulse</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 3:12pm<b>Damafia</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 11:02am<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 6:07pm

CitizenSnipz's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

CitizenSnipz's favorite FMLs

Today, I met up with an old high school friend who I used to make fun of because he put so much effort into his studies. Turns out he makes my annual salary in a month. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 10:12am / United States / Money

Today, while registering at the grocery store, a customer came into my lane with a 100 piece boiled shrimp platter. Feeling hungry, I muttered "nom nom" under my breath. The old man called my supervisor. Apparently I called him a moron. FML

by Anonymous / 12/20/2010 at 12:02am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/19/2010 at 3:51pm / United States (Arizona) / Animals

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I went into labor with my first child, and as much as I pleaded, I had to wait for my husband to finish his raid in World of Warcraft before he'd take me to the hospital. FML

by newmother / 12/05/2010 at 8:38am / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, I tried on the new dress I bought for myself. I, for once, thought I looked pretty all right. I asked my dog, "How do I look?" and she threw up on my pillow. My brother can't stop laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2010 at 4:42am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my friend and I were racing on our bicycles, when my chain snapped. I went over the handlebars and slid, on my back, for about ten feet. FML

by me / 11/11/2010 at 1:11pm / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, my mother keyed my car because I wouldn't invite her into my home and get her a cup of tea, so she could continue screaming that she was going to kill me while I tried to feed my 4 month old daughter. The last time I got her a cup of tea she threw it in my face. FML

by crazyparents / 11/10/2010 at 2:12am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2010 at 12:32am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was waiting to take a dump in a gas station restroom. A 300 pound man walked out, shook his head, and said "I'm sorry" to me. FML

by mr_p / 11/01/2010 at 3:39pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

by Tai / 10/31/2010 at 9:30am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I was sucking on a Tic Tac. Just as I was starting to get into it, the Tic-Tac suddenly shot down my throat. After a minute of coughing and gagging, it came back up... out my left nostril. FML

by DeepTaccer / 10/30/2010 at 5:28pm / United Kingdom (Norfolk) / Health

Today, as a physics teacher, I was testing a class to see how high a sound frequency they could hear. One girl claimed she could hear the sound even though it was physically impossible. Without thinking, I replied "Only dogs can hear this frequency." Needless to say, she was picked on all day. FML

by mrtut / 10/29/2010 at 8:17am / United Kingdom (Merseyside) / Kids

Today, I spent all day handing out flyers advertising my services as a psychic. I got only one call. The caller wanted to inform me that I had misspelt the word "psychic" on my flyer. She was right. FML

by Anonymous / 10/27/2010 at 1:58am / United States / Work

Today, my girlfriend and my parents staged an intervention, and have asked me to go to rehab. What they want me to go to rehab for? World of Warcraft. FML

by leve80paladin / 10/25/2010 at 11:06am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous