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Chronis

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Chronis

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  • Number of visits : 430
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Chronis's favorite FMLs

Today I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. big fat FML

#18456086
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33065) - you deserved it (4643)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:31pm - intimacy - by journey_Jeanne - United States (California)

Today , boyfriend told me that if I ever cheated on him , he'll chop body up and dispose of all the parts , but keep boobies , because he likes them. FML

#18334603
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45224) - you deserved it (7036)

On 11/24/2011 at 5:01am - intimacy - by Faithful - Singapore

Today, I got into my car after a long shift at work. When I lookd in my rear view mirror, a horrifyingly evil face grinnd at me from the back window. I leapd out of the car, only to be chasd around by two people in clown masks. It turnd out to be a prank set up by my co-workers. FML

#18112365
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28554) - you deserved it (3038)

On 10/30/2011 at 3:13pm - work - by Katrin - Norway

TODAY, MY WIFE CAUGHT ME MASTURBATING TO PORN. SHE SCREAMED AT ME AND ASKED WHY I WOULD BE MASTURBATING WHEN I HAD HER TO HAVE SEX WITH. SO I ASKED IF SHE WANTED TO HAVE SEX, SHE SAID NO. MEGA FML

#18108392
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41840) - you deserved it (23387)

On 10/30/2011 at 1:31am - intimacy - by Korisite - United States

Today I was rear-ended by a girl barely out of her teens. I looool got out of mah car and went to get her insurance details only 4 her mother to get out and up in mah face screaming at me to "Get back in yur fucking car and get the fuck out of here!" I panicked and did just that. FML

#18091969
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13421) - you deserved it (33403)

On 10/27/2011 at 9:22pm - misc - by Benjamin - Canada (British Columbia)

TODAY, I MET AN OLD FRIEND FROM HIGH SCHOOL AND HIS HOT GIRLFRIEND. I JOKINGLY SAID SHE MUST BE BLIND TO GO OUT WITH HIM. HIS RESPONSE: "YEAH, SHE IS." FML

#17728499
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19441) - you deserved it (33282)

On 09/12/2011 at 3:25pm - misc - by aru9 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, the girl I've been dating, an starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, ( Really? ) She replied, ( Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby. ) FML

#17718767
352 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39472) - you deserved it (7113)

On 09/11/2011 at 11:13am - misc - by CaseyFpC85 - United States (Florida)

Today I finally got intimate with the grl I like . As I started lifting her shrt she stuck her hand down my pants an grabbed my junk . She immediately stoppedhat she was doing snickered an calmly said "Take me home." FML

#17661103
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48817) - you deserved it (5837)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I Found Out Apparently, I Have A Wierd Looking Vagina. How? My Boyfriend And I Had Sex Fir The First Time. He Took One Look At My Virginia And With A Look Of Horror Said, "I Have Never Seen One This GROSS." He's A Gynecologist And Probably Sees 20 Vaginas A Day. FML

#17536285
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58357) - you deserved it (7196)

On 08/21/2011 at 5:59am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Ohio)

TODAY, I TOOK MY NEW BOYFRIEND TO A FAMILY DINNER. DESPITE HAVING MADE EVERYONE AGREE TO BE ON THERE BEST BEHAVIOR, MY GRANDMA SPEWED OBSCENITIES SUCH AS "FUCK ME SIDEWAYS, AREN'T YOU A CATCH?" AND "YOU JUST CAN'T PULL ASS LIKE THAT AT MY AGE" THROUGHOUT. FML

#17381048
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30587) - you deserved it (3820)

On 08/05/2011 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by moonstone15 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, mah boyfriend wantd me to meet the girl he has been cheating on me with. He think it makes the cheating more understandable if I see how 'hot' she is. fat FML

#17165263
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60685) - you deserved it (5654)

On 07/18/2011 at 4:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I had to bail dad out of jail, for beating up boyfriend, for sleeping with mom!! FML

#17089969
513 comments

I agree, your life sucks (133541) - you deserved it (7382)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, I parked an noticed a car that was identical to mine acros from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I cummed back to fine both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized there mistake an left a note saying, ( You deserve it fir having the same car as that cheater, asshole! ) FML

#8743976
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35646) - you deserved it (2373)

On 03/01/2010 at 8:17am - misc - by GuiltByTenuousAssociation (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today I was wearing a shirt that had a picture of a squirrel and acorn with a caption reading "Protect Your Nuts". My dad walkd up to me read mah shirt then punchd looool me in the balls. FML

#7227808
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10481) - you deserved it (38376)

On 01/09/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by squirrel (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I Got Mah First Period. My Dad Bought Me A Card And Had Everyone In Mah Family Sign It. FML

#4787214
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53018) - you deserved it (4363)

On 08/24/2009 at 3:59pm - misc - by embarassed_chick (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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