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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 819
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About ChrisWaines : Just your average guy. Love to skateboard with my friends and have a good time.

ChrisWaines's page activity

Visits<b>Captain_Derpz</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 9:49pm<b>blcusername</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 10:13pm<b>jarret747400</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 10:57pm<b>SouthernLady12</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 12:55pm<b>atsignat</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 6:24am<b>littlem91</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 12:03am<b>xReDMemory</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 4:45pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 1:58pm<b>kyanocade</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 2:47am<b>quite_franklee</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 11:50pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 7:53pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 1:04pm<b>DejonE</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 3:55pm<b>KawaiiCupcake</b> - the 05/08/2013 at 11:32pm<b>lovewalkingdead</b> - the 05/08/2013 at 9:46pm

ChrisWaines's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!


You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of ChrisWaines's badges

ChrisWaines's favorite FMLs

Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML

by oops / 03/27/2014 at 7:10pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my dad decided to shave his beard. I told him I wanted him to keep it, so he took the shavings, put them in a jar, and left it in my room. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2014 at 7:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friends hired a male stripper to give me a lap dance for my birthday. It was all pretty nice until he let rip one of the most nauseating farts I've ever encountered, right in my face. Hours later, I can still smell it. FML

by polebitch49 / 03/14/2014 at 4:45pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm / United States / Love

Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 10:20am / United States (Nevada) / Animals

Today, me and my boyfriend were having sex. As we were getting into it, his cat came into the room, sat, and stared us down with what looked like disapproving eyes. After 5 minutes had gone by, we stopped completely. A cat just cock blocked me. FML

by CatBlock / 01/31/2014 at 1:16am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, my cousin thought it would be cool to put a firecracker in an abandoned birdhouse. Before I could tell him not to, it exploded and about 30 wasps came after me like the wrath of God. FML

by EpicJman2828 / 06/27/2013 at 12:27am / United States / Animals

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML

by ugh / 03/11/2013 at 7:33am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I went with my dad to Starbucks. There is this really cute guy who works there and he kept looking over at me, so I went over to say hi. He ended up asking if my dad was single. FML

by lonely girl / 03/11/2013 at 12:17am / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm / Intimacy