Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 June 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11563
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About ChloroformPanda : They say that we're dreaming too big.
I say that this town is too small.

ChloroformPanda's page activity

Visits<b>UPTDraco</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 1:31pm<b>FMLollipop</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 2:35am<b>teacupofsunshine</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 12:00am<b>sparrowren</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 6:59pm<b>marcusaaaa</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 8:23pm<b>Cian_1</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 3:53pm<b>Tymaster5</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 3:03pm<b>legendofthegames</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 1:32pm<b>Internetdude</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 11:15am<b>lnp</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:09pm<b>FloridaGirl23</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 9:31pm<b>MonkeyBurgerMan</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 11:45pm<b>waterski123</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 12:20am<b>Yanchi</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 12:48pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 4:22pm<b>McKenzieAlea</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 9:37am<b>iphonefive</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 11:23pm<b>Izacundo1</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 10:47pm

ChloroformPanda's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of ChloroformPanda's badges

ChloroformPanda's favorite FMLs

Today, my roommate gave me a self-help book on alcoholism for my birthday. He's an alcoholic. I gave him that book around 8 months ago. FML

by notalcoholic / 12/09/2009 at 12:29am / Philippines (Quezon City) / Miscellaneous

Today, a friend of mine and I were talking about how hygienic we are. She mentioned she hadn't shaved her downstairs in a while. I was looking at the computer when she said this so when I turned to look at her I saw she had pulled down her pants and underwear. I was face to face with hairy muff. FML

by roxyriley / 12/07/2009 at 4:30am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up and found that someone had taken a dump on my car. They'd apparently felt bad about it, as they'd then keyed "sorry" into the door. FML

Today, I started growing hair on my upper lip. I'm finally becoming a man! Too bad I'm a 17 year old girl. FML

by harry / 12/04/2009 at 12:55am / Hong Kong / Health

Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the shower. With my girlfriend. Apparently, my brain and my erection had a battle for who got the most blood, and my erection won. FML

by Silent / 12/03/2009 at 12:50pm / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, I was lying in bed minding my own business when my mom entered the room. I was proposed to a few weeks ago by my boyfriend, and my mom came in to tell me that my boyfriend's mom was on the phone. Turns out, he stole the engagement ring from her drawer. FML

by violet / 11/29/2009 at 5:52pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML

by Nomoresandwish / 11/29/2009 at 3:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom tried to give me advice on how to improve my looks. I scoffed at her but listened to her advice anyway. She ended her tirade with, "I just want you to get laid someday." FML

by Anonymous / 11/27/2009 at 4:45pm / United States (Idaho) / Intimacy

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

by obsessed / 11/27/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

Today, I hit a deer. The worst part? Papa deer saw me hit mama deer, and proceded to ram into my car. FML

by Anonymous / 11/26/2009 at 2:11pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Transportation

Today, I was on webcam with my boyfriend and absent-mindedly began sucking on a marker. He jokingly told me it was sexy, so I continued while making obscene gestures and moans. Suddenly he began to look nervous. I turned around to see my dad looking at me, disgusted and confused. FML

by NotSoSexy / 11/25/2009 at 7:39pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to convince my boyfriend to come over, telling him it would be "worth his time." He asked, "How?" I said, "Dazzling conversation of course. Just kidding, you'll probably get laid." He replied, "Oh. Well I would if it was for the conversation." FML

by sexyconvo / 11/25/2009 at 2:23am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to surprise my wife at her softball game. I saw her distinctive motorcycle jacket through the canvas dugout wall and decided that I would feel her up from behind, to surprise her. She lent her jacket to a friend. FML

by rider / 11/24/2009 at 5:58am / Qatar (Ad Dawhah) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my dad hides his Viagra from my mom by keeping it in an Aspirin container. Now I have a terrible headache and a boner. FML

by sickkid / 11/23/2009 at 1:05pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was feeling a little racy and decided to send my boyfriend some naked pictures of myself. He responded, "That's OK, but does your face have to be in them?" FML

by denise / 11/23/2009 at 12:07am / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy