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Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
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Today, my landlord came to my apartment because of complaints from my neighbors, saying that animals are not allowed inside. Turns out my roommate makes cat-noises when she's bored. My landlord still doesn't believe me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20411) - you deserved it (1419)
On 12/13/2011 at 8:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Norway (Sogn og Fjordane)
Today, my mom, who is relatively new to Facebook, posted on her friend's wall, telling her about her recent diagnosis of vaginal thrush. She assumed that her wall post was private. Six of my friends liked the post. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26316) - you deserved it (2044)
On 12/03/2011 at 6:23am - intimacy - by djkimmaz - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
Today, I discovered that you should always unplug the electric mixer before licking the beaters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8102) - you deserved it (52509)
On 11/29/2011 at 12:21pm - misc - by seanjohn268 (man) - Canada
Today, during my boyfriend's family reunion, I started my period but didn't have any tampons. I asked my boyfriend to ask his mom if she had any. I sat on the toilet waiting, then heard him loudly ask his whole family "Does anybody have a tampon my girlfriend can have?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25350) - you deserved it (2869)
On 11/25/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by Jessie - United States
Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27757) - you deserved it (4475)
On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12496) - you deserved it (39335)
Today, on the subway, a woman got off without her suitcase. I grabbed the case, chased her onto the platform, and shouted, "You forgot your suitcase!" while the doors closed behind me. In actual fact, it wasn't her suitcase, and its actual owner was still on the train. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24238) - you deserved it (7237) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I sent my grandma a naked picture instead of my girlfriend. While attempting to delete it, I sent it again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14347) - you deserved it (36472)
On 11/04/2011 at 12:38am - intimacy - by me (man) - United States (California)
Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18351) - you deserved it (18306)
On 11/01/2011 at 1:52pm - misc - by bakedplum (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had to explain to a patient that no, her nipples were not slowly getting smaller. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16472) - you deserved it (1534)
On 10/11/2011 at 5:43am - work - by Anony-moose (woman) - United States
Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the kitchen. She ate everything from cookies and ice cream to deli meat. The only thing left in the house are vegetables. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15585) - you deserved it (11411)
On 10/08/2011 at 4:40pm - health - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my dad came to confiscate my phone. I stuck it in between my boobs so he wouldn't be able to see it. He said, "Honey, your breasts aren't big enough to hide that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11124) - you deserved it (27733)
On 10/08/2011 at 1:03pm - misc - by G - United States (California)
Today, my daughter-in-law revealed to me that she caught my husband having an affair with her best friend. This was five years ago, and she is only telling me now because he stopped paying her the blackmail money to keep her mouth shut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29376) - you deserved it (1674)
On 09/17/2011 at 12:43am - love - by cheated (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that the man who offered to put up the woman I love in exchange for me helping out with his rent, has in fact been her "other" boyfriend since before she moved in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17239) - you deserved it (2877)
On 09/09/2011 at 7:48pm - love - by Just me (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49692) - you deserved it (5248)
On 08/21/2011 at 5:59am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Ohio)
Monday 20 May 2013
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