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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8922) - you deserved it (814)
On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)
Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20319) - you deserved it (1089)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)
Today, my parents decided on my punishment for failing an English test. No deodorant for a week. They think they're so hilarious, they told all their friends and now it's all over Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7655) - you deserved it (1093)
On 04/30/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by sockmonkey (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boss overheard me singing, "I need a shit, I need a shit" on my way to the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1870) - you deserved it (7580)
On 04/26/2012 at 6:44am - work - by NoPrivacy (woman) - United States
Today, I realized just how awful my relationships have been when I discovered I emotionally connect with women on Jerry Springer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4501) - you deserved it (1456)
On 04/22/2012 at 2:14pm - love - by Coquette (woman) - United States
Today, a guy asked me why I'm single. As a joke, I told him that not only do I have a penis, but that it's so large that most men are intimidated by it. He wasn't impressed. And I actually wonder why I'm single. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2439) - you deserved it (5756)
On 04/13/2012 at 9:11am - intimacy - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I started my brand new job. I was late because while repairing my favorite pair of high heels, I got superglue in my eye. They had to scrape my cornea and I have to wear an eye patch. I'm now the "new pirate" in the office. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8491) - you deserved it (10046)
On 04/04/2012 at 9:41pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33788) - you deserved it (2825)
On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I faked a sore throat for the school nurse so I could go home early. It took my dad the rest of the school day just to get there to pick me up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1911) - you deserved it (11182)
On 03/19/2012 at 12:28pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I found out that my resume contained the word "masturbation" in the skills section, courtesy of a practical joke by my best friend. I have been using this CV unsuccessfully for over two months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8194) - you deserved it (1886)
On 03/13/2012 at 8:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, on my way to work, I had to squeeze by a man sitting in a large truck parked next to my car. I was in a bit of a hurry and in my rush the collar of my shirt got caught on his grill. My shirt ripped and I flashed the guy my entire boob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17542) - you deserved it (2525)
On 03/12/2012 at 12:28am - work - by titillating (woman) - United States (California)
Today, it's my birthday. My fiancé decided to give me the gift of "freedom". That's how he put it, anyway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9077) - you deserved it (746)
On 02/28/2012 at 5:04pm - love - by salt. - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36462) - you deserved it (5498)
On 01/28/2012 at 9:34pm - intimacy - by Tiana - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5907) - you deserved it (18984)
On 01/28/2012 at 6:31pm - misc - by GothicbunnyxC (woman) - Canada (Prince Edward Island)
Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3519) - you deserved it (6753)
On 01/26/2012 at 11:45am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)
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