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Carrikins

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Carrikins
  • Town/Country : Perth, Australia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5389
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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Carrikins's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML

#4331370
819 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20542) - you deserved it (464140)

On 08/06/2009 at 9:35am - misc - by who_could_it_be - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was just too hot. I stripped down and, being home alone, pranced around nude, lip synching and playing air guitar to some music. I was getting really into when I opened my eyes and looked out the window to see an old man with binoculars on his terrace. He wasn't birdwatching. FML

#4326549
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17132) - you deserved it (33122)

On 08/06/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by PeepShow (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home to find a BMW partially blocking my driveway. I was already having a bad day, and was upset that some stuck up fool blocked my driveway, so I keyed the driver's side. 5 minutes later my parents show up. The BMW was a graduation gift for me. FML

#3553930
404 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19241) - you deserved it (202881)

On 07/07/2009 at 1:25pm - misc - by Stoopid (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML

#2804463
815 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27084) - you deserved it (279080)

On 06/11/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by ouchers (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69260) - you deserved it (179861)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

#2418263
443 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18918) - you deserved it (210850)

On 05/29/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I decided to scare my 10 year old sister for fun. I hid behind a door and leapt out, shouting "Boo!" when she walked by. She burst into tears and ran screaming to my mom. My mom thought I'd hit my sister, and was so angry that she punched me in the eye. FML

#2298353
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50973) - you deserved it (16765)

On 05/26/2009 at 12:38am - kids - by tsakashvili (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I had my high school reunion. The nerdy guy that I picked on all 4 years had married a Swedish supermodel, then divorced her for a Brazilian supermodel. My girlfriend works at 7-11. Karma sucks. FML

#2019724
627 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22040) - you deserved it (253647)

On 05/17/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by karmasabitch (man) - United States (New York)

Today, it's my birthday. I have gotten three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office singing me a happy birthday. FML

#1930337
391 comments

I agree, your life sucks (332169) - you deserved it (15777)

On 05/14/2009 at 1:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

#1815627
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (398324) - you deserved it (52950)

On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that the girl I've been dating online for over three months is actually a very bored 14-year-old boy. FML

#1617373
506 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81532) - you deserved it (222726)

On 05/04/2009 at 2:12am - love - by Iman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

#1604682
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (248360) - you deserved it (14293)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I left a party after drinking, and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep for emergency situations to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently, alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML

#1550059
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21120) - you deserved it (221008)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:21am - health - by breathalizard (man) - United States (North Dakota)



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