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Carrikins's favorite FMLs
Today, I was walking home with my boyfriend. There's a short cut to my house by jumping a fence but he insisted that we take the long way because, "Girls don't jump fences." To prove him wrong, I jumped the fence. I fell and broke my leg. FML
by Josie / 06/05/2012 at 12:27am / United States (Kentucky) / Love
Today, my boss became obsessed with a movie about a pimp. He now refers to all my female coworkers as his "bitches" and refuses to treat us like human beings. Whenever we make a mistake, he rolls his eyes and laughs, "So typical of a prostie." FML
by kufan1324 / 06/04/2012 at 11:47pm / United States / Work
by BooBabe / 06/04/2012 at 7:50pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy
by cloudberry / 05/27/2012 at 4:00am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I texted my friend and asked her what her sad status on Facebook was about. She texted me back saying her step-mother had passed away. I tried to reply with "awwh" but my phone autocorrected it to "ahaha." FML
by iPhonekid / 05/27/2012 at 3:19am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by HorcruxDelight73 / 05/26/2012 at 7:00pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by girly girly / 05/26/2012 at 10:42am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by ilovemymomma / 05/26/2012 at 3:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by MALICEG / 05/26/2012 at 3:00am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/25/2012 at 8:15pm / United States / Kids
by KieRendan / 05/25/2012 at 3:59pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous
Today, on the brink of a stiflingly hot summer, I've come to a terrible realisation. It seems the apartment I've just moved into has been specially insulated to trap enough heat inside for the occupants to survive the planet's next Ice Age. FML
by Broon / 05/25/2012 at 3:55pm / United Kingdom (Leeds) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 05/25/2012 at 2:21pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by jingle / 05/25/2012 at 7:18am / United States (Delaware) / Work
Today, I thought I felt my baby kicking for the first time. After excitedly exclaiming this fact to the few people around me, I involuntarily let out the loudest fart. Not the baby kicking, just gas. FML
by GothicAngel17 / 05/19/2012 at 7:05am / Australia (Queensland) / Health
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, a week after dropping my car off for the third time in a month at the dealership because of…