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Carrikins

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Carrikins

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7633
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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Carrikins's page activity

Visits<b>krupa1017</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 7:57pm<b>kubackster</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 4:17pm<b>Gshelton09</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 5:48pm<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 4:42am<b>tuckit</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 8:56pm<b>Gregshelton8611</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 6:50pm<b>mpkpm</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 4:07pm<b>Qele</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 8:34pm<b>icebreaker012</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 11:10am<b>msmama1985</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 8:50am<b>Bentonic</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 12:31am<b>Izzyduck07</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 7:07am<b>adyb</b> - the 11/20/2013 at 1:01am<b>lingo171</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 9:26pm<b>Swiko</b> - the 05/05/2012 at 4:05pm

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Carrikins's favorite FMLs

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

Today, my friend saw a stamp on my hand and asked me which club I had gone to last night. I was so desperate to seem cool that I lied, instead of admitting it was actually from a children's play group that I took my kids to. FML

#21105342
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32666) - you deserved it (8050)

On 04/05/2014 at 6:05pm - kids - by lamemom - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I went to my crush's house. We were watching a movie when suddenly he started kissing me. As it deepened he began to feel around. He was groping my armpit the whole time but I was too embarrassed that my underarm could pass for my boobs to redirect him. FML

#21104962
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43895) - you deserved it (7121)

On 04/05/2014 at 3:14am - intimacy - by armtits and big pits - United States (Florida)

Today, while in line at my local bakery, an old man passed wind in front of me. The smell was like nothing I've ever experienced before. I managed to withstand it, but the child behind me could not, and spewed orange vomit all over my back. FML

#21104869
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43688) - you deserved it (3061)

On 04/05/2014 at 12:04am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my phone rang just seconds after I left a conference meeting to go use the restroom. It wouldn't have been a problem, except it seems one of my friends thought it would be funny to change my ringtone to a woman having an orgasm. FML

#21104664
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37305) - you deserved it (4374)

On 04/04/2014 at 7:46pm - work - by King_of_hearts (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I met a really nice girl at a club, and we went back to my place. I was finally going to lose my virginity, but just as she started kissing me, I panicked and ended up fainting. When I came to, I was still clothed, and she was long gone. FML

#21104650
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38930) - you deserved it (11669)

On 04/04/2014 at 7:20pm - love - by ohai ur hawt, wanna fuzzzZzZZzzZzz (man) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, my mom visited, and I left her for a few minutes while I used the bathroom. While I was stuck taking a crap, she went on one of her religious rants, telling my children that Easter was off this year because their precious "pagan" Easter Bunny had been murdered. FML

#21104621
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35098) - you deserved it (3537)

On 04/04/2014 at 6:38pm - misc - by kaheera4 (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my favorite band logo is no longer being used by said band because of copyright issues. I have this logo tattooed on my body. FML

#21100070
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23594) - you deserved it (51761)

On 03/30/2014 at 10:27am - misc - by Cult (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked my daughter to buy me two pints of milk. Apparently, the shop only had four-pints, so she got that and poured half down the drain. FML

#21099986
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43735) - you deserved it (6365)

On 03/30/2014 at 6:04am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I was randomly selected for a pat-down while at the airport. Being from the south, I said thanks out of pure habit. The guy replied, "No sir, thank YOU." and winked. FML

#21098671
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37042) - you deserved it (4730)

On 03/28/2014 at 4:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML

#21091119
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37312) - you deserved it (4950)

On 03/19/2014 at 7:19pm - misc - by BigBlue (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML

#21086197
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39899) - you deserved it (8163) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2014 at 12:33am - work - by LeChameauTrisomique - France (Centre)

Today, my mother took me to go and see my grandfather, who I hadn't seen since I was 4. The first thing he said to me was, "Pfwoarr, look at those tits." FML

#21085518
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52574) - you deserved it (5535)

On 03/13/2014 at 5:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I met my mom's new business partner for the first time. I shook his hand, and introduced myself as "Lisa's daughter". I'm a guy. FML

#21085066
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34449) - you deserved it (11741)

On 03/12/2014 at 6:23pm - work - by CurtisWogan (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend asked why I never let him go down on me. I told him that it doesn't do much for me, even though it really does. I didn't have the courage to tell him that it's because he acts like a rabid dog when he does. FML



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