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CaptenAwesomeXD

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CaptenAwesomeXD
  • Town/Country : Malmö, Sweden
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 26 September 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 2336
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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CaptenAwesomeXD's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML

#794025
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66301) - you deserved it (16920)

On 04/04/2009 at 12:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a man in my town was arrested for hiding methanphetamine in a hollowed out walking cane and distributing it to the population of his retirement complex. That man was my 58 year old father. FML

#259923
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62448) - you deserved it (2221)

On 03/10/2009 at 11:01am - misc - by Noname (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

#206263
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22121) - you deserved it (36023)

On 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm - misc - by Señor Guapo (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
496 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213617) - you deserved it (73278)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, after seeing a girl for a few weeks on and off I sent her a text to see if she wanted to go out the next saturday. Predictive text changed "go" to "in". So..."Why don't we in out on saturday?" She stopped calling me. FML

#612
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14511) - you deserved it (3551)

On 12/30/2008 at 11:53am - love - by Noname - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was writing to my girlfriend on msn when her roommate answered «Sorry, this is not Marie, she is at her boyfriend’s». Really? I've looked everywhere in my flat, I can’t find her. FML

#39
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66631) - you deserved it (3317)

On 10/25/2008 at 12:56pm - love - by Icy -



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

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