CaptenAwesomeXD

Search for a member

CaptenAwesomeXD

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 26 September 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4372
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

CaptenAwesomeXD's page activity

Visits<b>Oihana</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 9:04pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:51pm<b>melissa8998</b> - the 04/19/2011 at 1:55pm<b></b> - the 01/10/2011 at 11:54pm<b>lilauer13</b> - the 12/30/2010 at 12:50pm<b>josepigo</b> - the 12/28/2010 at 1:06am<b>candy29</b> - the 12/28/2010 at 12:54am<b>aarontheawesome</b> - the 12/02/2010 at 6:59pm<b>Sorrows</b> - the 11/20/2010 at 12:47pm<b>masterbaker11</b> - the 11/13/2010 at 12:48pm<b>jellyomg</b> - the 10/10/2010 at 5:37am<b>281go</b> - the 10/01/2010 at 3:50pm<b>sugarnspicee</b> - the 09/12/2010 at 8:12pm<b>oddjonny</b> - the 06/26/2010 at 11:45am<b>DogmaT</b> - the 06/05/2010 at 8:11pm<b>Miss_lunatic</b> - the 06/05/2010 at 5:43pm<b>SZeth</b> - the 06/03/2010 at 7:35pm<b>HunnyLove</b> - the 06/01/2010 at 5:30pm

CaptenAwesomeXD's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

CaptenAwesomeXD's favorite FMLs

Today, I got written up at work for making a customer feel bad. I made him feel bad by laughing uncontrollably at him when he asked if we sold real light sabers. FML

by Timmah / 08/31/2009 at 1:18am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

by NotThatKind / 08/24/2009 at 12:28am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, while we changed positions, he shouts, "Power Rangers - It's Morphin' Time!" FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

by gbhlaughingstock / 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2009 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

by piratequeen / 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Mississippi) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 7:11am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it I decided to whisper in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I hear behind me, "I am." FML

by unbelievable208 / 08/05/2009 at 1:28am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I was with my mom and my boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and my mom excitedly says "You have friends!" As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says "Kidding, it's just me." My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML

by NoFriends / 08/02/2009 at 1:12pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

by NinjaPanda88 / 08/01/2009 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

by dumbo / 07/30/2009 at 10:43am / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

by Pumpkin / 07/17/2009 at 10:00pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I realized my new kitten is the spawn of the devil. It decided to go get itself stuck in a tree. I tried to climb up to rescue it. But it kept climbing higher. I was about to grab the cat when I fell. The cat then jumped down and started purring. FML

by WearingOff / 07/13/2009 at 11:03pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my suburban, white boyfriend of two years told me he wanted to tell me something serious. He sat me down, looked me in the eye and said "I want to be gangster." I started laughing thinking he was joking. He was 100% serious. FML

by hatboxghost / 07/09/2009 at 1:17am / United States / Love

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

by Jeweler / 06/26/2009 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous