About CaptainNap124 : Lol I love funny stuff and xbox :P women are horrible... Men should stick to the "bro's before ho's" mindset
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I found out that my parents used all of the college money I have been saving up for 8 years to buy a beach house. The reason they waited until now to tell me? A tree fell on it, and they need more money for repairs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30168) - you deserved it (1719)
On 09/12/2011 at 3:36am - money - by Me - United States
Today, I was presented with a bill for $27,601 by my single, alcoholic, deadbeat father. Why? "For having to raise your goddamn lazy ass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28421) - you deserved it (1885)
On 08/03/2011 at 12:45am - money - by bigbill - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65180) - you deserved it (6888)
On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I was working the drive-thru at McDonalds, and as I handed out a Diet coke to the customer, the man started growling and yelled "HULK SMASH!" He smashed the cup with two fists and drove off. I was drenched in soda. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29555) - you deserved it (3457)
On 06/24/2011 at 12:46am - work - by Sam (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's laundry machines to me, I blurted out, "It's okay, my pants are used to handling huge loads". FML
I agree, your life sucks (12659) - you deserved it (31768)
On 06/20/2011 at 3:37am - misc - by NewTenant (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend told me I looked pretty. I said, "Aww, that's the first time you've said that to me." He replied, "Well, it's the first time you've looked pretty." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40031) - you deserved it (6987)
On 05/25/2011 at 12:06pm - love - by Username - United States (California)
Today, my doctor told me I should consider a breast reduction. I'm a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28678) - you deserved it (9411)
On 05/11/2011 at 10:20pm - health - by anonymous -
Today, I was listening to my son's teacher gossip about students whilst in the grocery store. I was thrilled when she described my son as "A model student". However, she then went on to say, "Which is surprising considering that his parents are trailer trash." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34410) - you deserved it (5979)
On 04/23/2011 at 5:26am - kids - by kindgartin (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, I ran into one of my teachers from high school. When I told her I just recently graduated college and was starting graduate school in the fall, she said "you don't have to lie, some people just are not cut out for college. There is no shame." I wasn't lying, I graduated with honors too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24933) - you deserved it (1899)
On 02/27/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6371) - you deserved it (35917)
On 02/14/2011 at 12:31am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I wanted to annoy my sister by playing the air horn app on my iPhone. I forgot that I had headphones in. Let's just say I quickly had to change my underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6717) - you deserved it (54766)
On 02/01/2011 at 1:50pm - misc - by Brea - United States (Missouri)
Today, after some filing mistakes, and a lot of waiting on hold, I'm finally registered for Spring classes. I was ready to enjoy this term, until I found out that my ex, who was forced into therapy after he threatened to kill me, is in half of my classes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22852) - you deserved it (2072)
On 01/18/2011 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13810) - you deserved it (37095) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins
Today, I sat in my room on the computer instead of attending the party of the year. I got kicked out because I wasn't invited. The party was in my back yard, hosted by my brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24994) - you deserved it (2737)
On 12/09/2010 at 12:35am - misc - by person123abc (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out my girlfriend had sex with three different guys in one day. All at a party. A party that I was at. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39387) - you deserved it (5720)
On 11/30/2010 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by crushed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Monday 17 June 2013
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