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CaptainNap124

Offline (the 07/07/2015 at 2:17am) | Search for a member

CaptainNap124

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 23 January 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6304
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About CaptainNap124 : Lol I love funny stuff and xbox :P women are horrible... Men should stick to the "bro's before ho's" mindset

CaptainNap124's page activity

Visits<b>NikL20</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 10:52pm<b>Corvo_Attano</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 6:51am<b>shorty6823</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:32pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 11:35pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 4:22am<b>lyzziesaysrawrrr</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 3:02am<b>Grauncho</b> - the 01/03/2013 at 10:20pm

CaptainNap124's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of CaptainNap124's badges

CaptainNap124's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me I looked pretty. I said, "Aww, that's the first time you've said that to me." He replied, "Well, it's the first time you've looked pretty." FML

#16341966
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48924) - you deserved it (9205)

On 05/25/2011 at 12:06pm - love - by Username - United States (California)

Today, my doctor told me I should consider a breast reduction. I'm a man. FML

#16136460
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35807) - you deserved it (12760)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:20pm - health - by anonymous -

Today, I was listening to my son's teacher gossip about students whilst in the grocery store. I was thrilled when she described my son as "A model student". However, she then went on to say, "Which is surprising considering that his parents are trailer trash." FML

#15895508
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40915) - you deserved it (7665)

On 04/23/2011 at 5:26am - kids - by kindgartin (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I ran into one of my teachers from high school. When I told her I just recently graduated college and was starting graduate school in the fall, she said "you don't have to lie, some people just are not cut out for college. There is no shame." I wasn't lying, I graduated with honors too. FML

#15142777
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31154) - you deserved it (2548)

On 02/27/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML

#14967873
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8756) - you deserved it (49243)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:31am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I wanted to annoy my sister by playing the air horn app on my iPhone. I forgot that I had headphones in. Let's just say I quickly had to change my underwear. FML

#14797258
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8401) - you deserved it (62378)

On 02/01/2011 at 1:50pm - misc - by Brea - United States (Missouri)

Today, after some filing mistakes, and a lot of waiting on hold, I'm finally registered for Spring classes. I was ready to enjoy this term, until I found out that my ex, who was forced into therapy after he threatened to kill me, is in half of my classes. FML

#14622823
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28531) - you deserved it (2441)

On 01/18/2011 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17956) - you deserved it (43750) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I sat in my room on the computer instead of attending the party of the year. I got kicked out because I wasn't invited. The party was in my back yard, hosted by my brother. FML

#14138235
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33224) - you deserved it (3831)

On 12/09/2010 at 12:35am - misc - by person123abc (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my girlfriend had sex with three different guys in one day. All at a party. A party that I was at. FML

#14035490
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47523) - you deserved it (6545)

On 11/30/2010 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by crushed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I discovered the piggy bank I made a Facebook account for has more friends than me. It has 12. FML

#13733621
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22865) - you deserved it (12747)

On 11/06/2010 at 12:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while working at a hospital, I told a patient to smile for the camera when taking an xray. His response was, "I have Bell's Palsy and haven't smiled in 5 years." FML

#13601804
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24327) - you deserved it (7135)

On 10/26/2010 at 12:50pm - health - by oaksac191 - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love in the backseat. Being in the moment we didn't notice the car moving. We DID notice the pole that stopped us though. FML

#13346165
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8909) - you deserved it (33822)

On 10/06/2010 at 7:41pm - intimacy - by Remember the parking brake - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my wife of 2 years told me she was pregnant, after we've been trying for ages. Excited, about to call my parents, my wife then told me, "Don't get your hopes up it might not be yours, the father could be 5 other guys." And then asked me what I'd like for dinner. FML

#12277666
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55595) - you deserved it (4209)

On 08/03/2010 at 12:07am - intimacy - by Cheated (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at work, when a co-worker began to shake a near empty box. Without thinking, I shouted "What if there was a baby in there? You just killed it!" I then remembered she recently suffered a miscarriage. FML

#12008337
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12432) - you deserved it (69911)

On 07/20/2010 at 7:08pm - work - by jjjjjjmmmmm92 - United States (Rhode Island)



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