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CaptainFoxbutt

Offline (the 08/27/2014 at 4:32am) | Search for a member

CaptainFoxbutt

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 877
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About CaptainFoxbutt : First of all, the username is a joke between me and my irl friend.

Anyway, hello person who is currently reading this. You many have decided to look at my profile because of the peculiar username, because you're a stalker, because you are bored, because you are genuinely interested in who I am, or because of some other reason that I have failed to bring up.

I am a pretty chill person in general, I swim and play Pokemon, CoD (overrated as procreation, by the way), Zelda (one of the three greatest series ever), Mario, to name a few.

Music is awesome, except for that music genre that's been popular for the past 6 years. That genre is shit.

I play piano and clarinet, and I'm learning guitar and an assortment of percussion instruments.

If you indeed message me, I will indeed consider replying. Being social for the win.

Oh, and I'm 15. That information might be important to some people.

CaptainFoxbutt's page activity

Visits<b>philipino</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 7:34pm<b>elliecandlin</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 6:16am<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:54am<b>kingcam19</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 12:02am<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:17pm<b>carliflowerr</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 12:40pm<b>SiRiSpartan</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 11:40pm<b>its_bree</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 7:43pm<b>FML_Elle</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 7:04pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 8:45am<b>Ayezed</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 10:28pm<b>thelittlemissy</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 11:32am<b>threer</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 6:25pm<b>mzrayray</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 1:46pm<b>ghostytocute1000</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 2:35am<b>krupa1017</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 3:27pm<b>Vintag3Xoxo</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 10:16pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 10:44am

CaptainFoxbutt's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of CaptainFoxbutt's badges

CaptainFoxbutt's favorite FMLs

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

#21225439
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39170) - you deserved it (4346)

On 07/31/2014 at 1:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

#21187679
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52039) - you deserved it (16835)

On 06/25/2014 at 8:30am - kids - by failed dad (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML

#21158075
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53905) - you deserved it (7364)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:40am - love - by damn it rose (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, some girl's mom gave me a load of abuse for endangering her daughter's health. How? By deleting my Facebook account, which caused her to have a serious panic attack. Apparently she thought we were best friends, and that I was ditching her. I'm confused too. FML

#21149491
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42609) - you deserved it (3123)

On 05/23/2014 at 6:44pm - misc - by nikaea (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML

#21149341
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40678) - you deserved it (4147)

On 05/23/2014 at 3:32pm - kids - by todaddy (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to inform a patient that she has an STD. She reacted by kicking me in the nuts. FML

#21140637
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48990) - you deserved it (4383)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:08pm - health - by bruised_scrotum - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

#21137389
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58808) - you deserved it (5035)

On 05/12/2014 at 1:17am - kids - by kids -

Today, a customer asked me how long our 6-inch sandwich was. FML

#21136526
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42677) - you deserved it (4588)

On 05/11/2014 at 10:46am - work - by Makeitdance - United States (California)

Today, I decided to confront my friend who has been stealing from me for months. She denied it, while wearing a pair of my pants. FML

#20959350
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43948) - you deserved it (3964)

On 11/16/2013 at 12:17am - misc - by CODgirl102 - United States (Florida)

Today, while working at Chipotle, a teenage girl asked in all seriousness if she "could have a steak burrito, but with like, chicken instead?" FML

#20951236
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42612) - you deserved it (3491)

On 11/09/2013 at 9:15am - work - by fmylyfe (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my mother came over to visit, and my kids started excitedly telling her Christmas is coming soon. She freaked out, saying Christmas is a "Satanic holiday" and telling them that Santa is going to hell along with everyone who celebrates it. My children are now traumatized. FML

#20933801
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41154) - you deserved it (3229)

On 10/25/2013 at 7:20pm - kids - by Jane M (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents at a family dinner. There was plenty of alcohol on offer, as is normal at our get-togethers. She got blind drunk and ended up crying to my mum about how I can't please her because I have a small penis and my oral sucks. FML

#20933730
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53073) - you deserved it (9086)

On 10/25/2013 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by Dick the Greater (man) -

Today, as a science teacher, I did a science experiment in front of a class. One of my students asked me if it was "photoshopped." He was being serious. FML

#20930096
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42168) - you deserved it (2820)

On 10/22/2013 at 10:24am - kids - by jdawn99 - United States (Kansas)

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

#20926483
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42922) - you deserved it (4672)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm - misc - by overly nationalistic redneck (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, I was pushed off of a glacier by a very angry tourist. Why? I work as a glacier guide, and apparently some people find it overly frustrating to be informed that there isn't a café on the glacier. FML

#20924969
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45796) - you deserved it (2713)

On 10/18/2013 at 8:40am - work - by Quasimodo (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)



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