About Callyn : I'm bored.
Callyn's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Callyn's favorite FMLs
by Matthew / 11/26/2011 at 9:33pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I admitted to my wife that I'd really like to get a Prius, but I was worried that if I did, everyone would question my sexuality. She told me, "I don't know why you care, everyone already thinks you're gay." FML
by Rich / 11/26/2011 at 3:50pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by meeeeeee / 11/26/2011 at 10:38am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by hitintheeye / 11/26/2011 at 10:09am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/26/2011 at 12:54am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, while waiting for my mom to pick me up from university, I took out my phone and pretended to talk to someone. I didn't think people still pointed and laughed, but apparently they do when your mom pulls up and shouts, "Stop pretending to talk to someone." FML
by Anonymous / 11/26/2011 at 12:54am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML
by TraumatizedMother / 10/02/2011 at 3:27am / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, I picked up a lady's dropped wallet and chased after her despite my sprained ankle. When I finally caught up with her, she smashed her chili sauce filled hotdog across my face and kicked me in the groin, accusing me of stealing her wallet. I was kept at the police station for 3 hours. FML
by fmlsrslyahhh / 09/06/2011 at 3:40pm / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by UhOh / 07/08/2011 at 4:38pm / United States (Arizona) / Health
by anonbob / 07/07/2011 at 9:28pm / New Zealand (Wellington) / Love
by Maddie / 06/20/2011 at 4:05pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had been telling me for the past two weeks that he had something planned for the occasion. His plan? Me watching TV with his parents, who hate me, while he went to work. His gift? A brand new Xbox 360 for himself. FML
by Anonymous / 01/29/2011 at 6:55am / Canada (British Columbia) / Geek
by Anonymous / 12/26/2010 at 4:32pm / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, 50,000 copies of the new edition of the town's phone book came out. I manage a pizza place and bought a full menu ad. Apparently the ad designer got confused, as they placed my cell phone number in huge bold letters at the bottom of the ad instead of the store's phone number. FML
by Anonymous / 09/07/2010 at 3:16pm / United States (Iowa) / Work
- Today, I’m an au pair. The little boy that I take care of announced during a family dinner that I… Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, I found myself completely naked, tied to a chair with a slice of ham on each breast. Note to…