Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BreezyMargarita

Search for a member

BreezyMargarita

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 7 September 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2964
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

BreezyMargarita's page activity

Visits<b>DOMEinic</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 6:25pm<b>tigers28kp</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 12:54pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 4:27am<b>tygerarmy</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 5:26am<b>IERTysonI</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 6:41pm<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/07/2013 at 2:41am<b>chandlerbelacic</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 5:27pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 05/25/2013 at 2:24pm<b>pekkamecha</b> - the 01/26/2013 at 10:14pm<b>homeboyangst</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 2:12am

BreezyMargarita's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of BreezyMargarita's badges

BreezyMargarita's favorite FMLs

Today, I realised half my underpants were missing. In related news, my slob of a housemate hasn't washed hers in several weeks, and has been stealing mine. FML

#20699444
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43892) - you deserved it (3364)

On 06/01/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by WHOO HOO AIDS (woman) - Poland (Mazowieckie)

Today, my boyfriend of two years, whom I supported through the death of his father, and whose invalid mother I also took care of, suddenly dumped me. The fact that I've put on a little weight due to recent stress disgusts him, and he "can't date a chubster". FML

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

#20698818
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81558) - you deserved it (5569)

On 06/01/2013 at 3:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, as I was getting out of my car, an old and obese lady walked up to me and called me an "inconsiderate heartless bitch" for using the last handicap parking spot. I guess she didn't see my wheelchair. FML

#20698730
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60418) - you deserved it (2970)

On 06/01/2013 at 2:21am - misc - by regstl - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65650) - you deserved it (18718)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at karate, my sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML

#20698551
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57538) - you deserved it (4823)

On 06/01/2013 at 12:31am - health - by Mayyouneverfindpleasureinavagina (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the girl I've been talking to online and sending certain pictures to is actually my ex's new boyfriend. He ended up telling me he'd just wanted to see how he compared to me down below because my ex refused to go into detail about it. FML

#20698485
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47387) - you deserved it (22376)

On 06/01/2013 at 12:03am - intimacy - by WTF (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

#20697165
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30409) - you deserved it (33373)

On 05/31/2013 at 10:59am - animals - by fuckshitcockwaffle (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that my boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML

#20696605
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54672) - you deserved it (3113)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:20am - love - by wtf mom - United States (California)

Today, I was texting my boyfriend when he said, "Hold up." Thinking it'd be funny, I ran and grabbed my copy of the movie Up, and took a picture of me holding it and sent it to him. He replied, "Getting real tired of your shit." Then dumped me for my "dumb taste in humor." FML

#20696601
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62481) - you deserved it (13655)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:16am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, my boyfriend "finally figured out" that he couldn't possibly be the father of my child, and publicly broke up with me. When I reminded him that I was already pregnant when we first met, he "extra" broke up with me for making him look stupid. FML

#20696470
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45667) - you deserved it (6808)

On 05/30/2013 at 11:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML

#20696326
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44735) - you deserved it (2943)

On 05/30/2013 at 10:35pm - work - by heyyoitsapotato - United States

Today, in a public restroom, an elderly lady started bitching me out for not washing my hands. I was so intimidated that I did so under her accusing watch. I'm quite intolerant to many soaps, and I now have a horrible rash on my left hand because I was too frightened to explain. FML

#20695638
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40346) - you deserved it (16422)

On 05/30/2013 at 5:18pm - health - by :( (woman) - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

#20695159
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63076) - you deserved it (5066)

On 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by life insurance for 1 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I uttered the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" in class. Moments later, I'd been called a "racist twerp" and kicked out of class by the same English teacher who once tried to have another kid suspended for using the word "titillate", because apparently it's "pornographic". FML

#20695090
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47223) - you deserved it (3916)

On 05/30/2013 at 11:20am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: