Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BrEnNo1023

Search for a member

BrEnNo1023

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1984
  • Number of comments : 95
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About BrEnNo1023 : Insert opinion here

BrEnNo1023's page activity

Visits<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 6:59pm<b>Raven_Muse</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 10:53pm<b>Jonny_Blaze0017</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:21pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 12:12am<b>myoukei</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 10:21am<b>spiers1</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 11:32am<b>melons</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 4:59pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 5:24pm<b>LordDoodle</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 4:41pm<b>madamspammalot</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 3:49pm<b>Jimmyd0t</b> - the 06/19/2011 at 10:56am<b>tumbletumble</b> - the 06/23/2010 at 1:40pm<b>ohrlynow</b> - the 03/13/2010 at 6:31pm<b>sodahhhr</b> - the 12/17/2009 at 10:36pm<b>crazychika</b> - the 09/01/2009 at 10:52pm<b>HEARtBREAkKIDDxl</b> - the 08/29/2009 at 10:14pm<b>prplr</b> - the 08/26/2009 at 6:51pm<b>iwadasn</b> - the 08/26/2009 at 4:38pm

BrEnNo1023's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of BrEnNo1023's badges

BrEnNo1023's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML

#142795
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (247968) - you deserved it (57126)

On 02/26/2009 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Picaresque (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML

#125156
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56086) - you deserved it (6673)

On 02/24/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by iliketurtles (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to chill with my best guy friend and his girlfriend, whom I recently met after I moved to the area. After a few beers, my buddy leaned over and tried to make out with me. I quickly backed up and shockingly looked over at his girlfriend to expect the same reaction. She winked. FML

#120277
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59665) - you deserved it (6793)

On 02/24/2009 at 12:30am - intimacy - by LilShawty2000 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got an email from my professor with my grade for a paper. It said, "Solid writing, but you should have proofread your final draft more carefully." In a moment of annoyance, I typed in the reply box, "God should have proofread your FACE more carefully." My elbow hit the send button. FML

#97434
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14125) - you deserved it (59674)

On 02/21/2009 at 4:43pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to Macy's to go shopping, I was wearing a shirt and tie and dressed nicely. Customers came up to me with questions, but I just ignored them. Minutes later, thinking I was an employee, the manager came and yelled at me, and threatened to fire me. FML

#85022
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38182) - you deserved it (10214)

On 02/20/2009 at 12:27am - work - by muffinmen1022 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was watching a documentary on The World's Fattest Man. Half way through the show the reported started talking about his girlfriend. The Fattest Man in the world has a girlfriend. I'm 21 an have never had a girlfriend. FML

#82135
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50698) - you deserved it (8115)

On 02/19/2009 at 8:39pm - love - by Skido (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
503 comments

I agree, your life sucks (226552) - you deserved it (78686)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
503 comments

I agree, your life sucks (226552) - you deserved it (78686)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML

#55493
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9117) - you deserved it (60564)

On 02/16/2009 at 7:24pm - misc - by lunarboy (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, he grabbed my double chin and goes "gobble, gobble". FML

#36168
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34757) - you deserved it (17790)

On 02/13/2009 at 9:37am - misc - by fmlfmboyfriendah (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I greeted my table (I'm a server) with a colloquial "Hey there, guys, how's it going?" The customers were three butch lesbians who thought I was incorrectly identifying their gender. I received no tip (on a $35 bill), and they registered a corporate complaint about my "insensitivity." FML

#29316
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36717) - you deserved it (4017)

On 02/12/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by ServingYouWings (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I greeted my table (I'm a server) with a colloquial "Hey there, guys, how's it going?" The customers were three butch lesbians who thought I was incorrectly identifying their gender. I received no tip (on a $35 bill), and they registered a corporate complaint about my "insensitivity." FML

#29316
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36717) - you deserved it (4017)

On 02/12/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by ServingYouWings (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

#27684
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65667) - you deserved it (3089)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by sober (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

#27684
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65667) - you deserved it (3089)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by sober (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

#27684
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65667) - you deserved it (3089)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by sober (woman) - United States (Virginia)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: