Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Bolter197

Search for a member

Bolter197
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 880
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Bolter197's last visitors

sneakattackedalexmac222

Bolter197's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Bolter197's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

#2418263
443 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18918) - you deserved it (210907)

On 05/29/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was getting ready for my first date with a boy I really like when my dad insisted on meeting him. My dad is super protective and a cop. He cleaned his gun in front of my date and made it clear he had to be careful with me. My date started to cry when we got to the car. FML

#2376689
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62854) - you deserved it (5476)

On 05/28/2009 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was bored and decided it would be fun to pretend to be an undercover cop and pull over other cars. The first car I pulled over was a real undercover cop. FML

#1033363
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27396) - you deserved it (258647)

On 04/16/2009 at 8:19pm - misc - by tvaladie (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was fired because a patron complained that she didn't like the way I kept staring at her kids. I was a lifeguard. FML

#800907
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75873) - you deserved it (2942)

On 04/04/2009 at 3:03pm - work - by Lifeguard (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
515 comments

I agree, your life sucks (227566) - you deserved it (29251)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to my friend's house. While she went to the kitchen, I noticed a little pink pastry on her desk. It looked really good, so I decided to take a bite before she got back. As I bit into it, a sizzling noise started, and foam overflowed in my mouth. It was a bath bomb. FML

#458793
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8084) - you deserved it (72267)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:09am - misc - by skywayavenue (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up to find that my dog was missing. I spent about an hour searching for him when my psycho ex-girlfriend texted me his photo. She'd kidnapped him. After driving over there, she shot paintballs at my car. Now I have no dog and a colorful car. FML

#128340
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90191) - you deserved it (6226)

On 02/24/2009 at 10:21pm - animals - by sammatthews2007 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, when I saw a big box that looked like a playstation, I got really excited and my parents were there and everything looked like it really was something big, so I start to open the wrapper and surprise... it was a lamp. FML

#759
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13002) - you deserved it (4327)

On 12/30/2008 at 3:30pm - money - by - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: