Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BodyCountEndless

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

BodyCountEndless

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6117
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

BodyCountEndless's page activity

Visits<b>cb1549</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 3:43pm<b>bfsd42</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 4:11pm<b>toby24palm</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 5:39pm<b>Faith13</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 5:43pm<b>imawesomeokay</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 2:38am<b>jjramirezjj1</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 1:42pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 12:05pm<b>monkeysuncle213</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 10:07am<b>tsunami12</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 1:28am<b>Iamnotfat</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 12:08am<b>devstarr</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 12:07am<b>Dennisse_47</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 11:50pm<b>vickiiii</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 9:17pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 8:23pm<b>Khanya</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 7:41pm<b>pandamimo</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 5:54pm<b>soccerstar1996</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 5:37pm<b>supernaturalcat</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 5:23pm

BodyCountEndless's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of BodyCountEndless's badges

BodyCountEndless's favorite FMLs

Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML

#21275225
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35942) - you deserved it (4866)

On 10/10/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by bluevix (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up to find that my acne has lined itself beautifully in a perfect 'L' shape in the centre of my forehead. FML

Today, my son was crying because he's afraid he might get Ebola. We live in Maine, and he's 16. FML

Today, after getting stressed out by my parents having a serious fight for hours, I'm now listening to their make-up sex. FML

#21275167
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35760) - you deserved it (2835)

On 10/10/2014 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by housewiththinwalls - Sweden

Today, I and a coworker got bitched out and suspended by our boss after our computers got infected with a weird porn virus. It soon turned out the virus had come from our boss' infected memory stick. Did he apologize? No. Is our suspension still in force? Yes. FML

#21275140
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37000) - you deserved it (2457)

On 10/10/2014 at 6:34pm - work - by shatfjord (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML

#21275111
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31096) - you deserved it (18230)

On 10/10/2014 at 5:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30952) - you deserved it (14261)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally worked up the nerve to talk dirty to my boyfriend, after he promised not to laugh at me. All seemed well, until I heard laughter. It wasn't him, though; it was his family listening from the other room. FML

#21275034
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36154) - you deserved it (5632)

On 10/10/2014 at 3:33pm - intimacy - by TalkDirtyToMe - New Zealand

Today, I got my first compliment in over a year. It was from my gynecologist, saying I have a beautiful cervix. FML

#21275026
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32211) - you deserved it (2921)

On 10/10/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by JulietMarie - United States (New York)

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I noticed he looked uncomfortable. When I asked what was wrong, he asked when the last time I shaved was. I answered, "I shaved my legs this morning." He shook his head and said, "No, I meant your face." FML

#21274726
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33212) - you deserved it (5050)

On 10/10/2014 at 1:52am - love - by Jasmine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that I am "un-promotable" to the job that I have been promised for the last two years because, I "don't suffer idiots well." Idiots. FML

Today, I got roped into a volunteering thing at the last minute. I was waiting outside with all these kids who looked hungry. Feeling bad, I passed around crisps and cookies. Turns out we were at a convention to promote healthy eating in malnourished children. FML

#21274410
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28485) - you deserved it (4908)

On 10/09/2014 at 6:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while arriving to a date for the first time in a couple years, the first thing out of his mouth was, "I'm only dressed up because I had court today." FML

#21274403
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29099) - you deserved it (3153)

On 10/09/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking down the street holding my boyfriend's hand, when a seemingly sweet old man said to him, "Hey, you've got to hold her hand properly". I asked him to show me what properly meant. He licked my hand. FML

Today, as I was about to leave home for my first sweet taste of freedom at my new apartment, my car died. I'm stuck here for at least the weekend and can look forward to my mom driving me to work. Freedom. FML

#21274254
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26772) - you deserved it (2387)

On 10/09/2014 at 1:53pm - misc - by gonesofast - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: