Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

BodyCountEndless

Online | Search for a member

BodyCountEndless

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3863
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

BodyCountEndless's page activity

Visits<b>cb1549</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 3:43pm<b>bfsd42</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 4:11pm<b>toby24palm</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 5:39pm<b>Faith13</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 5:43pm<b>imawesomeokay</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 2:38am<b>jjramirezjj1</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 1:42pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 12:05pm<b>monkeysuncle213</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 10:07am<b>tsunami12</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 1:28am<b>Iamnotfat</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 12:08am<b>devstarr</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 12:07am<b>Dennisse_47</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 11:50pm<b>vickiiii</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 9:17pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 8:23pm<b>Khanya</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 7:41pm<b>pandamimo</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 5:54pm<b>soccerstar1996</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 5:37pm<b>supernaturalcat</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 5:23pm

BodyCountEndless's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of BodyCountEndless's badges

BodyCountEndless's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on my first date in 8 years. While we were looking at the menu, the guy said: "So if you're vegetarian, why're you so fat?" FML

#21241880
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40814) - you deserved it (6794)

On 08/20/2014 at 6:14pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41554) - you deserved it (7321)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad and I got into an argument, and he ended up calling me a son of a bitch. My mom heard and started arguing with him over him calling her a bitch. Three hours later, I'm now staying at my gran's house with my mom and hoping her threats of a divorce weren't for real. FML

#21241796
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38439) - you deserved it (2823)

On 08/20/2014 at 4:08pm - misc - by sonofaneuroticwench (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my 24-year-old, unemployed brother stole all of my food money and went out with his friends. His punishment from our parents? He has to pay me back when he gets a job. My stomach has to wait. FML

#21241750
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38976) - you deserved it (2579)

On 08/20/2014 at 2:59pm - money - by HungryStudent (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I'm getting married. I have a big poofy white dress and, oh yes, the shits. Here's hoping I can make it down the aisle without rushing off to the toilet. FML

#21241662
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39000) - you deserved it (2816)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:01pm - love - by ithinkicanmakeit - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML

#21241441
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39404) - you deserved it (5289)

On 08/20/2014 at 2:07am - intimacy - by Mia (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, it's the 16th day of my period. FML

#21241406
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61964) - you deserved it (4085)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:15am - health - by BagelTheOtaku (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks found the engagement ring I tried to give to my ex. She started crying and said yes. FML

Today, I called my boyfriend to let him know that I'm pregnant. He instantly replied "Bullshit!", then hung up and apparently skipped town. FML

#21241143
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41807) - you deserved it (5886)

On 08/19/2014 at 6:30pm - kids - by Xbieblette51 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had some painful gas at work, so I tried to silently ease it out. It was silent all right; silent, and so deadly that someone exclaimed, "What the fuck?!" My coworkers traced it back to me. Now they're all pointing their mini desk fans in my direction to make a point. FML

#21241122
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36278) - you deserved it (9904)

On 08/19/2014 at 5:54pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40361) - you deserved it (5655)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

#21241016
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41924) - you deserved it (15820)

On 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

#21240900
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23838) - you deserved it (43683)

On 08/19/2014 at 9:37am - misc - by drunk under 18 teenager (man) - Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz)

Today, on Facebook, all these parents posted photos of their child's last first day of high school, saying they were so proud as they left for senior year. It was my first day of senior year today, but my parents just gave me a high-five for not doing drugs. FML

#21240784
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36158) - you deserved it (7650)

On 08/19/2014 at 12:11am - kids - by morgie96 - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: