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BodyCountEndless

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BodyCountEndless

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  • Number of visits : 5939
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

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BodyCountEndless's favorite FMLs

Today, I received an email from an angry parent, demanding that I give his daughter an A on a project which I had given her a 0 on. The project was to pick an article related to science and to write an essay on it. Hers was a hoax article relating to Ebola patients rising from the dead. FML

#21276337
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33355) - you deserved it (4867)

On 10/12/2014 at 4:46pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, in the middle of sex, my husband accidentally headbutted me, almost knocking me unconscious. FML

#21276185
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30972) - you deserved it (3297)

On 10/12/2014 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by KO - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of three years, who can't get it up for me and has been blaming blood pressure issues, apparently has no problem getting it up while watching the neighbor undress from our window. FML

#21276105
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35676) - you deserved it (4055)

On 10/12/2014 at 9:21am - intimacy - by MotherMary - United States (Missouri)

Today, while waiting for a plane, a man in a wheelchair was struggling to get to baggage, so I helped him. I did so without realising that I passed through the "No Entry" gate. What did I forget? My phone, my ID, and my boarding pass. What do you need to get back to the plane? All of those. FML

Today, I got married. It was a beautiful ceremony with all of our family and friends. Too bad it ended with us leaving the reception before dancing even started, since my groom couldn't stop bawling his eyes out from all the stress. FML

Today, I went to my grandma's yard sale, only to find my baby pictures being sold for 25 cents each. FML

#21275511
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37990) - you deserved it (2971)

On 10/11/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by Forge (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML

#21275225
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35189) - you deserved it (4817)

On 10/10/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by bluevix (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up to find that my acne has lined itself beautifully in a perfect 'L' shape in the centre of my forehead. FML

Today, my son was crying because he's afraid he might get Ebola. We live in Maine, and he's 16. FML

Today, after getting stressed out by my parents having a serious fight for hours, I'm now listening to their make-up sex. FML

#21275167
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34998) - you deserved it (2811)

On 10/10/2014 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by housewiththinwalls - Sweden

Today, I and a coworker got bitched out and suspended by our boss after our computers got infected with a weird porn virus. It soon turned out the virus had come from our boss' infected memory stick. Did he apologize? No. Is our suspension still in force? Yes. FML

#21275140
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36358) - you deserved it (2449)

On 10/10/2014 at 6:34pm - work - by shatfjord (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML

#21275111
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30538) - you deserved it (17793)

On 10/10/2014 at 5:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30509) - you deserved it (14048)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally worked up the nerve to talk dirty to my boyfriend, after he promised not to laugh at me. All seemed well, until I heard laughter. It wasn't him, though; it was his family listening from the other room. FML

#21275034
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35398) - you deserved it (5565)

On 10/10/2014 at 3:33pm - intimacy - by TalkDirtyToMe - New Zealand

Today, I got my first compliment in over a year. It was from my gynecologist, saying I have a beautiful cervix. FML

#21275026
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31789) - you deserved it (2910)

On 10/10/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by JulietMarie - United States (New York)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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