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BodyCountEndless's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/09/2016 at 5:22pm / Transportation
by wantedphantom / 07/08/2016 at 10:26pm / Miscellaneous
by quackers / 07/08/2016 at 3:00am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by NotFromAustralia / 07/08/2016 at 1:25am / United States (Colorado) / Animals
Today, I was driving with my little brother when out of nowhere he yelled at me to stop. Thinking it was urgent, I slammed my breaks, almost getting rammed from behind. Why did he yell for me to stop? The Pokémon GO said there was a sparrow near us. FML
by PurplePanda_1927 / 07/07/2016 at 10:26pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I lost my job to the individual I just finished training. Within 2 hours after being escorted out, my old boss called and yelled at me for doing a lousy job. He was angry that the training was deficient and because the new person is as bad as I was. FML
by El Jeffe / 07/05/2016 at 1:54pm / United States (Utah) / Transportation
Today, my teacher marked a test question wrong, even though I was sure I got it right, so I went online to check. I found a government-approved website showing proof that my answer was correct. My teacher still counted it wrong, because, "we follow the book". That book's older than I am. FML
by Anonymous / 07/05/2016 at 12:19pm / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous
Today, I gave a presentation in class. I felt pretty good about it, until afterwards when I was told I lost points for communication because I'd been chewing gum. I wasn't, I just have a speech impediment. FML
by stupidteacher / 07/05/2016 at 11:02am / China (Guizhou) / Work
Today, I received an envelope with my name written in beautiful writing in my mailbox. I just moved in the day before and hadn't given the address to anyone or met my neighbors yet so I was a bit surprised by it, even more surprised to find nothing but a dick pic inside. FML
by ZeldaovaPeach / 07/05/2016 at 8:44am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to grab a coffee at a new café in town. While sipping my coffee, I noticed a man staring at me through the window. I thought he was browsing the menu before I looked up mid-sip to him staring at me in the eye, sucking on his finger. FML
by Finn / 07/05/2016 at 2:49am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
Today, while at school, some jerk shot me in the foot with a BB gun. While in agonizing pain, I yelled, "FUCK" as loud as possible. A teacher walked by, oblivious to the fact I had just been shot with a BB gun and wrote me up for, "Disrespectful language". FML
by Anonymous / 07/01/2016 at 6:35pm / United States (Utah) / Love
Today, while updating my résumé, I noticed that in my list of achievements it said "Torturing middle school students". I meant "tutoring", but I guess this explains why I'm still unemployed a year after I started looking for a job. FML
by fuckel4 / 07/01/2016 at 4:12pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I'm still reeling over the unexpected loss of my co-worker. I also received a notification…