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BodyCountEndless

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BodyCountEndless

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  • Number of visits : 4648
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

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BodyCountEndless's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen, and loud porn started to auto-play. The silence in the class was deafening as I tried to make it stop. FML

#21256842
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38560) - you deserved it (5059)

On 09/12/2014 at 9:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, at the restaurant where I work, a guest choked on a bone from her crosscut ribs. She asked me to bring the manager over, so I did. When he got there, she complained that the bone could have seriously injured her, and we should be more careful of where we put the bones in the ribs. FML

#21256772
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36939) - you deserved it (2512)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:05am - work - by Diachronic (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I confiscated a 1st grader's cell phone. It was better than anything I could come close to affording. FML

#21256659
149 comments

Today, I had to decline the sale of alcohol to a man who reeked of booze and was practically falling asleep at my till. He tried to convince me that he wasn't drunk, he was just blind. Still refusing to sell him the beer, he started yelling at me, accusing me of "being racist against the 'blinds'". FML

#21256123
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34551) - you deserved it (2686)

On 09/11/2014 at 2:49am - work - by PerfectVision (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I saw my teacher using her phone in the middle of class, so to joke around with her, seeing as we're on pretty good terms, I said: "Using your phone in class? For shame." She looks me in the eyes and says, "Would it be ok if I told you I'm arranging my father's funeral?" FML

#21256116
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40384) - you deserved it (14415)

On 09/11/2014 at 2:33am - misc - by lolwut - United States (Oregon)

Today, at work, a midget came in to buy beer. Not only was he almost as tall as me, he got offended when I had to card him and explain that the manager told me to card everyone, and that it wasn't because he was short. FML

#21256044
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31395) - you deserved it (2683)

On 09/10/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by mybad - United States

Today, someone in my class referred to the September 11th attacks as "Nine-Elevs". FML

#21255951
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33986) - you deserved it (2799)

On 09/10/2014 at 9:47pm - misc - by no - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I received a package. When my mom asked what I had bought, I had told her that I had ordered dumbbells and was going to start lifting. She laughed her way into the kitchen. FML

#21255855
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28018) - you deserved it (2943)

On 09/10/2014 at 6:40pm - health - by skinnyguy23 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I started a new job. Three of my Kenyan coworkers keep getting together and reminding me that having more than one wife is okay in their country. I've gotten 3 marriage proposals from married men so far. FML

#21255696
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33068) - you deserved it (2809)

On 09/10/2014 at 1:16pm - work - by notmarryingyou - United States (Washington)

Today, a guy tried to pick me up with the line, "You're ugly. Just kidding. You're my date." FML

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39565) - you deserved it (11022)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I received a package in the mail. It was a workout and weight-loss plan that I ordered last week. I finished an entire pizza and pint of ice-cream as I read the guidelines. FML

Today, a middle-aged customer tried to pay for a $2 ice cream bar with a credit card. It was declined, so he made me swipe it again. Declined. "Quit touching the metal strip," he scowled. I held the outer edge of it and swiped. Declined. He then bitched me out as his mother paid for him. FML

Today, I fell asleep with my luggage at a bus terminal. Upon waking up, I found that someone had opened my bags and stolen all my socks. FML

#21255144
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34787) - you deserved it (6686)

On 09/09/2014 at 4:23pm - misc - by Anonymous -



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