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Blue_Bug's FML badges
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Blue_Bug's favorite FMLs
Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML
by Igor / 12/19/2012 at 12:16am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
by idontevenlikebuttsthatmuch / 12/18/2012 at 4:44pm / United States (Arizona) / Transportation
by Bonding_boys / 12/17/2012 at 11:21am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML
by opinaise / 08/02/2012 at 9:00am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Love
Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML
by FauteuilEver Alone / 07/05/2012 at 4:11am / France / Miscellaneous
by NotSoAnon / 08/13/2011 at 11:31am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/22/2011 at 10:59am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I felt really depressed so I decided to go to McDonald's, get a sundae and cheer myself up. I got pulled over by the cops on the way, and was given a ticket for an expired registration. McDonald's was closed. FML
by Anonymous / 10/25/2010 at 10:43pm / United States / Transportation
Today, my car door and window were broken when a thief broke into my car. Cost to repair the damage? $600. Increase to my car insurance premiums? $40 a month. What'd they steal from my car? A $0.98 chocolate chip cookie. FML
by Anonymous / 10/16/2010 at 5:54pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation
Today, after spending the three previous nights cursing the noisiest bird alive that continually disrupts my sleep to the point where I just want to smash the damn thing's head in with a rock, I realised it's been my pedestal fan the entire time. FML
by SoundConfuser / 10/13/2010 at 7:58am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals
Today, while on a run off campus with my german shepherd, I tried to impress a couple of hot fraternity guys playing football outside of their house. I broke out into a full sprint. I then got tangled in my dog's leash and fell straight in to a parked jeep knocking myself unconscious. FML
by Radgirl / 04/27/2009 at 10:10pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…